1. Motor Trend never mentioned a “Chevrolet Caca.”
2. “Jaws of Life” in trunk.
3. Disqualified from Soapbox Derby for lack of structural integrity.
4. Turn on the wipers and two guys climb out of the trunk with squeegees.
5. Changing the pre-set radio stations voids the warranty.
6. Oil spills on your driveway prompt a visit from Greenpeace.
7. The telltale green-and-yellow-make-blue Zip-Lok seals on your air bags.
8. Car has spent more time on “60 Minutes” than on the road.
9. Manufactured in Zchkynk, Crzyktjkystan.
10. Bicycle pump required to inflate airbags.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people, and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
“Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical.”
– Yogi Berra
“Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.”
– Lillian Hellman
“I am not young enough to know everything.”
– Oscar Wilde
“For sale,” read the ad in our hospital’s weekly newsletter,
“sleeveless wedding gown, white, size 8, veil included.
Worn once, by mistake.”
When hiring new staff at the public library, I always ask applicants
what sort of supervision they’d be most comfortable with. One genius
answered, “I’ve always thought Superman’s X-ray vision would be cool.”
My niece was thrilled to hear that a new car wash was opening up right
in her neighborhood. “How convenient,” she said. “I can walk to it!”
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
My wife cannot ride in a car without telling whoever is driving what to do, when to do it, etc. She is, bar none, the worst back seat driver in the world. I have long thought this, though she would deny it. She claimed she seldom, if ever made comments about my driving. I, of course, claimed the opposite. Now I have proof. The other day we were headed for the mall and my daughter piped up, “Daddy, before you married Mommy, who told you how to drive?”
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “There’s a 30% chance that it’s already raining!”
Answer: Mean Girls! “Mean Girls”(2004) is about a young girl who was home schooled all her life and is just starting out at a public high school. She becomes popular and eventually alienates all of her true friends. This quote was said by poor air-headed Karen, one of the funniest characters in the movie. Her “special talent” was that her breasts could predict the weather. At the end of the movie, she became the school’s weather forecaster and was shown standing outside in the rain, groping herself.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “My acorn is missing… Did you eat the acorn?…You owe me a new acorn”.
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
Use the missing words or word fragments in the film titles below to make a festive phrase.
___ Golden Pond
Thelma ___ Louise
_____ _____ Hunting
The Road ___ Perdition
The Sum of ____ Fears
_____ in Black
ANSWER: The PEACEmaker, ON Golden Pond, Battlefield EARTH, Thelma AND Louise, GOOD WILL Hunting
The Road TO Perdition, The Sum of ALL Fears, MEN in Black, And the phrase is:
PEACE ON EARTH AND GOOD WILL TO ALL MEN. (Merry Christmas everyone)
Wednesday’s Quizzlers is……….
Whose car might this plate be on?
M+M & LR
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! GREAT SOLVING BANKS!
Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. www.schoons.com. www.awj-Law.com., http://www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com. http://www.cleancomedyguy.com.