Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Monday, April 25, 2016.   

Play with Words……………. 

The market garden was designed to produce produce.  

The city tip was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

In the boat, a row erupted amongst the oarsmen about how to row.

The nurse wound the crepe bandage around the wound.

Dessie decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

Chloe was too close to the door to close it.

When Ted saw the tear in the painting he shed a tear.

How can I intimate my thoughts to my most intimate friend?

Sherrie shed her shoes in the shed.

In terms of weight lead is in the lead.

Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.   

When the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

Why do our noses run but our feet smell?

I did not object to the object.

Freddie filled in his form by filling it out.

Why do performers recite a play, yet play at a recital?

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!     

 

DAILY QUOTES….    

Not to get technical, but according to chemistry alcohol IS a solution.

“If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.” –Doug Larson 

“Remember…a developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already owns a house in the woods.” –Dennis Miller  

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 

My boss is without peer when it comes to the rules and regulations that customs officials must follow. But when it comes to the law, well, that’s a different story. 

We were attending a court case in which we were prosecuting a smuggler. The judge asked the court, “Who is making these allegations?” 

My boss stood up and proclaimed, “I am the alligator, your honor.” Emoji

 

 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? ‘You know how it is, the beginnings? When you first fall in love and you can’t eat, you can’t sleep and getting a call from her, it makes your day. It’s like seeing a shooting star.’ 

Answer:  Beautiful Girls! Timothy Hutton explains his take on relationships. This film was directed by the late Ted Demme (also did ‘Blow’).  

Monday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ‘I’m somebody now, Harry. Everybody likes me. Soon, millions of people will see me and they’ll all like me. I’ll tell them about you, and your father, how good he was to us. Remember? It’s a reason to get up in the morning. It’s a reason to lose weight, to fit in the red dress. It’s a reason to smile. It makes tomorrow all right. What have I got Harry, hm? Why should I even make the bed, or wash the dishes? I do them, but why should I? I’m alone. Your father’s gone, you’re gone. I got no one to care for. What have I got, Harry? I’m lonely. I’m old.’

 

 

Friday’s Quizzler is……….

Add a different set of three letters to each of the following words to create a list of new words. The three-letter additions all have something in common. What are the new words, and how are the three-letter additions related? 

EASE

GIN

HEM

ICE

ON

OPUS

RILE

TIC    

ANSWER: DECEASE  MARGIN  MAYHEM  NOVICE  APRON  OCTOPUS  FEBRILE  SEPTIC

Each of the three-letter additions is the common three-letter abbreviation for the months of the year (DEC, MAR, MAY, etc). AUG completes the hint word.

 

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

Unscramble the words below, then take the letters from each word as instructed to form another word that is the answer to this teaser:

DOD Take letter 1 

ONRUM Take letters 1,2 & 5

CROSITH Take letters 1,2 & 3

ERVNE Take letters 1,2

Unscramble the letters you collected… what do you get?

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/  Emoji EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

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