Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

WELCOME to Wednesday, April 12, 2017.                              
Thinking out loud………..
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. – Mark Twain
My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I’ve endured over the past twenty-five years. – Paul Merton
I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100. – Woody Allen
My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section. – Norm Crosby
Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.
I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopaedia.  Let them walk to school like I did. – Yogi Berra
In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from the smallest to the tallest. What is the logic? Do tall people burn slower? – Warren Hutcherson
You learn something every day if you pay attention. – Ray LeBlond Mother misses children!
In youth we learn; in age we understand – Von Ebner-Eschenbach
If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. – Edgar W. Howe
Holidays Are Over
The summer holiday was over and young Jack returned to Wicor school. Only two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that Jack was misbehaving.
‘Wait a minute,’ mother said. ‘I had Jack with me for six weeks and I never called you once when he misbehaved.
School Learning
Nathan comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, ‘What did you learn today?’ He replies, ‘Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.’
Mum: How did you find school today?
Youngster: I simply hopped off the bus – and there it was.
New Teacher?
Mia: I think we need a new teacher.
Mum: Why is that?
Mia: Our teacher doesn’t know anything, she keeps asking us for the answers.
Doing Their Homework!
When Dad came home he was astonished to see Vic sitting on a horse, writing something.
‘What on earth are you doing there?’ he asked. ‘Well, the teacher told us to write an essay on our favorite animal.’ 
Answered Vic, ‘That’s why I’m here and that’s why Sara’s sitting in the goldfish bowl.’
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“The Cleveland Zoo announced today that its rare black rhinoceros is pregnant.
They made the announcement right after she confirmed it with her rhino-cologist.” -Seth Meyers
“Chipotle is considering opening a new restaurant that specializes in hamburgers.
After what their burritos did, Chipotle now wants to ruin a new set of buns.” -Jimmy Fallon
“A controversial 1,200-year-old document has been found that shows evidence that Jesus was married.
I don’t believe it. What married guy gets to spend all his free time with his 12 buddies?” -Conan O’Brien
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
A little boy was waiting for his mother. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, “Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?”
The little boy replied, “Sure! Just go straight down this street two blocks and turn to your right.”
The man thanked the boy kindly and said, “I’m the new pastor in town. I’d like you to come to church on Sunday. I’ll show you how to get to Heaven.”
The little boy replied with a laugh; “You’re kidding me, right? You don’t even know the way to the Post Office.”

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? 
‘The son of my hated rival trapped forever in a river of death? Hmm…is there a catch?’
ANSWER: Hercules! Spoken by Hades (James Woods).
Wednesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? 
‘Blame is for God and small children.’
Monday’s Quizzler is……….  
What expression is represented here?
I hear: “It, It, It, It, …”
You hear: “I_, I_, I_, I_, …”
ANSWER: You will never hear the end of it.
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….  
In this teaser, you are to start with the letter ‘I’ and then each time add a letter and shuffle it to make a new word. You need to continue this process until you reach the word ‘CAMPING’.
Not including ‘I’, you must do this in six (6) turns.
Good luck.
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LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at

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