Welcome, to Tuesday, January 5th! Today the Eucman takes a look at THE SYMPTOMS OF INNER PEACE by Saskia Davis. Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been expose to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict in the world. Some signs and symptoms of inner peace:

* A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.

* An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.

* A loss of interest in judging other people.

* A loss of interest in judging self.

* A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.

* A loss of interest in conflict.

* A loss of the ability to worry. (This is a very serious symptom.)

* Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.

* Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.

* Frequent attacks of smiling.

* An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.

* An increased susceptibility to the love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.

WARNING: If you have some or all of the above symptoms, please be advised that your condition of inner peace may be so far advanced as to not be curable. If you are exposed to anyone exhibiting any of these symptoms, remain exposed only at your own risk. “That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great day people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am history, Eucman!

Quotes of the Day

“Looking over the job listings on The Home Depot website, I noticed one with a highly peculiar job description: ‘On rare occasions there may be a need to move or lift light articles. Examples include executive assistant, bank loan officer and accounting clerk.'”

“My dad’s a writer. His favorite expression is ‘The pen’s mightier than the sword,’ which I believed for a long time. Until I moved into the city, and I got into a fight with this guy. He cut me up real bad, and I drew a mustache on his face…and then I wrote him a nasty letter.” –Kevin Brennan

“Right on the alarm clock is the snooze button, which is basically a built-in cheating option. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it earlier, but finally I just taped it down.” –Arj Barker

“We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.” –Plan 9 From Outer Space [Ain’t it the truth.]

“I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought, what good would that do?” —Ronnie Shakes

“They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, so I figure that’s why my boyfriend moved.” –Christy Murphy

Joke of the Day*

A professor stood before his class of twenty senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam. “I want to say that it’s been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you’ve all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one
gets their GPA messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a ‘B’ for the test.” There was much rejoicing in the class as students got up, walked to the front of the class, and took the professor up on his offer. As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining students and asked, “Anyone else? This is your last chance.” One final student rose up and opted out of the final. The professor closed the door and took attendance of those students remaining. “I’m glad to see you believe in yourselves,” he said. “You all get ‘A’s!”
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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘WHAT ain’t no country I ever heard of. Do they speak English in WHAT?’ Answer: Pulp Fiction. Samuel L. Jackson in arguably his best role ever

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???? ‘Bubba’s got a girlfriend, Bubba’s got a girlfriend!’ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. Lee Greenwood’s patriotic song meets The Guess Who’s feminine-sounding song. Answer: Proud to be an American Woman. The actual title of Greenwood’s song is “God Bless the U.S.A.” but so many people refer to it as its “nicknamed” title of “Proud to be an American”. This song has become a staple in American popular culture as a favorite song for 4th of July celebrations and sporting events. “American Woman” was a hit for The Guess Who in 1970.

Tuesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. The Red Hot Chili Peppers’ song about a bandmate’s death due to heroin and a big hit for Simon and Garfunkel. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday’s Quizzler is..
What word starting with BR, that with the addition of the letter E, becomes another word that sounds the same as the first?
ANSWER: Braking becomes Breaking.

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…
A science teacher told his after school class, “Whoever can get this egg into this smaller glass bottle will win no homework for a week! The rules are: the egg has to go into the bottle in one piece, and you can’t break the bottle. You can also use anything in the science lab. So, do we have any volunteers?”

A boy raised his hand and the teacher pointed at him. The boy took the egg and looked around the science lab for the things he could use. He saw some writing paper, a pack of matches, some vinegar, a sink, and the glass bottle. By the end of the after school class, the boy had gotten the egg into the smaller bottle.

How did he do it?
Note that, without doing anything to the egg, the egg can’t fit into the bottle.

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS CARRIE PALOMBO! GREAT JOB CARRIE!
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Answers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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