Welcome, to Thursday, March 4th! With all of the challenges that people face each day, I’ve decided to help people by posting defintions of Computer Lingo!  

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
2. COFFEE.EXE Missing – Insert Cup and Press Any Key
3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
4. 2 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
5. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
6. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
8. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL
9. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN
10. -{—– The information went data way ——–[
11. Best file compression around: “DEL .” = 100% compression
12. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
13. BREAKFAST.COM Halted…Cereal Port Not Responding
14. The name is Baud……, James Baud.
15. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!
16. Access denied–nah nah na nah nah!
17. C: Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
18. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..
19. Why doesn’t DOS ever say “EXCELLENT command or filename!”
20. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
21. Southern DOS: Y’all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
22. Backups? We don’ NEED no steenking backups.
Hey I’m just saying. Have a wonderful Thursday, people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!   
   
Quotes of the Day  

“Today is Pancake Day, the day that we remember and pay tribute to all of the pancakes that have died in my stomach.”-Jimmy Kimmel
 
“PETA was outside the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show last night protesting. They want the dogs to stop wearing fur.” -David Letterman
 
“Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God’s way of letting you know that you’re having too good a time.” –Dennis Miller
 
“Another blizzard in New York. I saw a cop yesterday and he was up to his neck in snow. I said, ‘Wow, you’re having a rough day.’ He said, ‘Yeah, it’s even rougher on my horse.'”
-David Letterman
 
“Buzz Aldrin will be on ‘Dancing With the Stars.’ He may be the only man to have walked on the moon and moonwalked in the same lifetime.” -Jimmy Kimmel
 
“Search crews in Montana are looking for two bags of mail in the wilderness that fell out of a plane last week. Meanwhile, a bunch of squirrels were excited to learn they’d been pre-
approved for a Discover Card.” -Jimmy Fallon 

Joke of the Day*

Even with a thousand games, dolls and crafts to choose from, my customer at the toy store still couldn’t find a thing for her grandson.  “Maybe a video or something educational?” I asked. “No, that’s not it,” she said.  We wandered the aisles until something caught her eye: a laser gun with flashing lights and 15 different high-pitched sounds.  “This is perfect,” she said, beaming. “My daughter-in-law will hate it.” 

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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from????   ‘Quiz time: Got your glasses on?’ ‘What?’ ‘It means you don’t know who your friends are.’   
Answer: Swing Kids. Arvid says this after Thomas (Christian Bale), his friend turned Nazi, threatens him.   

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from????  ‘You’re a creature of the night, Michael. Just like out of a comic book! You’re a vampire, Michael. You wait till Mom finds out, buddy!’

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Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006, try and identify which song or which artist.”  “Honey why you calling me so late? It’s kinda hard to talk right now. Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay? I gotta whisper ’cause I can’t be too loud Well, my girl’s in the next room Sometimes I wish she was you I guess we never really moved on It’s really good to hear your voice say my name It sounds so sweet…”     

ANSWER:”Lips Of An Angel” – Hinder. The hard rock single “Lips Of An Angel” came from “Extreme Behavior,” the album from Oklahoma City’s Hinder. This song was later covered by the country singer Jack Ingram. However, Ingram’s cover never reached the same popularity as Hinder’s original version.   

Thursday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006 try and identify which song or which artist.” “Hurt me I still can’t believe you hurt me Just when I thought it was safe to come in You let me want you, and need you, and then you left me, like a
child in the rain Now I’m mending myself of the pain Oh, you hurt me…”

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Wednesday’s Quizzler is..

Welcome to Crazy Cooking Catastrophes.
Today our host has decided to mix up an Antipasto Creature Feature…
Please follow these instructions carefully to unscramble [pun totally intended] the answer.

Cooking Tips:
Words like add, combine, stir in, sprinkle, garnish etc mean to add those letters to the mix.
Words like remove, drain, none left over, give, etc. mean to remove those letters from the mix.

In a bowl, combine one cup of MARMALADE with one tablespoon of OIL.
Kick MAE out of the kitchen [she’s dangerous with a whisk] then whip until frothy.

What creature will be in the bowl?   

ANSWER: Armadillo  

Thursday’s Quizzler is…

Your task is to discover the name of the country hidden in each of the following clues.

I have provided you with some of the letters from the word, as well as a synonym.

You have to rearrange the letters of each synonym and the given letters in order to find the name of the following countries.

Example:

KA + mineral deposit = K – ORE – A

1. MAI + rule = ?

2. SEN + got married = ?

3. ALIA + forbid = ?

4. BEI + race = ?

5. BEE + girl’s name = ? 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES SWEETJAZZ5! GREAT JOB JAZZZZZZZZZZZ!  

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Answers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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