Welcome, to Thursday, April 1st!  Church Bloopers….. This is a compilation of actual Church Bulletins and Service bloopers…

Our next song is “Angels We Have Heard Get High”.

Don’t let worry kill you — let the church help.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Tuesday at 4:00 p.m. there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.

Thursday night–Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when A. B. Doe supplied our pulpit.

The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.

The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Shirley Green, who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens. Hey I’m just saying. Have a great Thursday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!    
   
Quotes of the Day 

Men occasionally stumble on the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
– Sir Winston Churchill
 
The fellow who thinks he knows it all is especially annoying to those of us who do.
– Harold Coffin
 
A cynic is just a man who found out when he was about ten that there wasn’t any Santa Claus, and he’s still upset.
– James Gould Cozzens

Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.  

Among mortals second thoughts are wisest.

Cleverness is not wisdom.  

Danger gleams like sunshine to a brave man’s eyes. 

He was a wise man who originated the idea of God.  

I hate it in friends when they come too late to help.  

Luckier than one’s neighbor, but still not happy.  

No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow.  

One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.   
  

Joke of the day 

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. “Officer,” the man began, “I can explain.”  “No explanation needed!” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.” “But, officer, I have to tell you something.” The man tried again. “Just keep quiet! You’re going to jail and I’m not interested in what you have to say!” the officer barked. A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “Lucky for you that the chief is at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.” “Don’t count on it,” answered the fellow in the cell. “I’m the groom.” 

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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? “I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who’s ever lived: I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.” 

Answer: The Notebook! This movie always makes me teary-eyed. This beautiful quote is said by an elderly Noah Calhoun (played by James Garner) when retelling the story to his wife, Allie Hamilton (Gena Rowlands) who has Alzheimers. He tries, during the film, to revive her memories of him through retelling the story of their youth. It stars Rachel McAdams as a teenage Allie and Ryan Gosling as a teenage Noah. The movie starts with a man reading a story to a woman in a nursing home. It follows two teenagers who fall in love one summer only to be separated by Allie’s parents. When Allie goes back years later, their love reignites. She is left with a difficult decision. She must choose to marry either the man for whom she has nursed a love all her life or a man who she has recently met and is not entirely sure she loves. Coincidently, both main actors come from London, Ontario, Canada. The movie is based on the popular novel by Nicolas Sparks, who also wrote “A Walk to Remember”.   

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “Everything in this room is eatable. Even I’m eatable. But that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.”

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Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006, try and identify which song or which artist.” “I saw you with your new girl just yesterday, and I feel that I must confess.” 

ANSWER: “Walk Away (Remember Me)” – Paula DeAnda. The line is from “Walk Away (Remember Me)” by Paula DeAnda. Some reporters say that she has a young Mariah Carey / Mary J. Blige vibe. Her first single was “Doing Too Much.”       

Thursday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006 try and identify which song or which artist.” “This is the key that makes us wind it up, when the beat comes on, all the girls line up.”

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Wednesday’s Quizzler is..  
We’ve all seen a rebus like “midstuckdle” (stuck in the middle). The following clues are “revrebuseserse” (rebuses in reverse). That is, the clues below are answers to rebuses which all use the “in” construction. However, the original rebus from the clues below will actually form a word. For example, “Not old in actually existing” would be “renewal” (new in real). Can you solve the rest?
1. A short poem in scarlet
2. A room-dividing structure in a female pig.
3. A joining word in a close friend
4. A head of corn in grasping tightly
5. Nothing in what your eyes do
6. A wild beast’s shelter in stinking decay 

ANSWER: 1. Reversed (verse in red), 2. Swallow (wall in sow), 3. Mandate (and in mate), 4. Clearing (ear in cling)
5. Senile (nil in see), 6. Rodent (den in rot)  

Thursday’s Quizzler is…

Below are incomplete words. Place three (3) letters in each bracket so that you can complete the word on the left and begin the word on the right. Good luck.

acc (_ _ _) r
urg (_ _ _) ity
fas (_ _ _) acity
dunga (_ _ _) ling
fe (_ _ _) satile
gos (_ _ _) ping 

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Answers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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