Welcome, to Wednesday April 7th,  A teenager is: * A person who can’t remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number.

* A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast.

* A youngster who receives her allowance on Monday, spends it on Tuesday, and borrows it from her best friend on
Wednesday.

* Someone who can hear his favorite singer 3 blocks away but not his mother calling from the next room.

* A whiz who can operate the latest computer without a lesson but can’t make a bed.

* A student who spends 12 minutes studying history and 12 hours studying for her driver’s license.

* A connoisseur of 2 kinds of fine music–loud and very loud.

* An enthusiast who has the energy to bike for miles but is usually too tired to dry the dishes.

* A young woman who loves the cat and tolerates the brother.

* A romantic who never falls in love more than once a week.

* A budding beauty who never smiles until her braces come off.

* A boy who can sleep till noon on any Saturday he suspects the lawn needs mowing.

* An original thinker who is positive that her mother was never a teenager. 

Hey I’m just saying. Have a great Wednesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!    
   
Quotes of the Day 

“Under President Obama’s new airport security plan, anyone traveling to the U.S. will be stopped if they match the
description of a potential terrorist. Wait, we weren’t doing this already?” – Jimmy Fallon 

“You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright

“There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.” – George Carlin

“I wanted to be a Boy Scout, but I had all the wrong traits. They were looking for kids who were trustworthy, loyal,
helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean and reverent. Whereas I tended to
be devious, fickle, obstructive, hostile, impolite, mean, defiant, glum, extravagant, dirty, and sacrilegious.”
–George Carlin
 
“When I was a kid getting to borrow the car was a big deal. Before he handed over the keys, my dad always gave me a
lecture. ‘Now I’m not giving you this car so you can screw it up.’ Well, I said to myself, then I don’t want it.”
–Louie Anderson 
 
“You can’t believe how much hard work it is to con people into thinking that you’re productive when you’re unemployed.  Always thinking up things to tell them you’re going to do tomorrow, having to exaggerate every minute of your nowhere day…it’s worse than having a job. At least when you’re employed, when people ask about your day you can tell them to shut up and mind their own business.” –Drew Carey 
  

Joke of the day  

A father is in church with three of his young children, including his five year old daughter.  As was customary, he sat in the very front row so that the children could properly witness the service. During this particular service, the minister was performing the baptism of a tiny infant. The little five year old girl was taken by this, observing that he was saying something and pouring water over the infant’s head. With a quizzical look on her face, the little girl turned to her father and asked with all the innocence of a five year old… “Daddy, why is he brainwashing that baby?”  

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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? “You’re a lying Irish hooker from Portland and you used me to get Jack Reed to marry you!””No, I didn’t. I just want us to be friends.”  
Answer: Reds. In this scene playwright Eugene “Gene” O’Neill (Jack Nicholson) has just given a poem to free spirit journalist Louise Bryant (Diane Keaton), professing his love for her and hoping they can be a couple. However, Louise tells Gene that she and John Reed (Warren Beatty) were just secretly married. O’Neill is at first stunned by this news, then angry, and then says line one. Louise replies with line two. “Reds” tells the true story of journalist John Reed, who had strong Communistic leanings and hoped to transfer the spirit and idealism of the Russian Revolution to the American labor movement. Intertwined in this background is the personal relationship between Reed and Louise Bryant. This movie is similar to “Patton” and “Lawrence of Arabia” in that it tells the story of real people living in historical times (as opposed to fictional characters set in historical times like those in “Gone with the Wind” and “Titanic”). 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “That place at the base of a woman’s throat? You know – the hollow here – does that have an official name?”
“Good God, man, pull yourself together.”
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Tuesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006, try and identify which song or which artist.”   “Step out the Caddy Deville, It’s on a base of steel, Them boys checkin us out, Know when we dress to kill”? 

ANSWER: “First I let my wheels spin, den I let my screens fall. Den I let my trunk beat, the green ridin em all tall.”?        

Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006 try and identify which song or which artist.” “Meet me in the trap, it’s going down”?  “Meet me in the trap, it’s going down”?

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Tuesday’s Quizzler is..  
Below are two clues for words that are homophones of each other. For example, “Number after one…Also” would result in “Two…Too”. Can you get all of the words?

1. Tiny Spider…Not sure if I will or not
2. Made the gun more accurate…Quoted
3. Prophet…Scorch
4. Container…Light
5. Head organ…Yes 

ANSWER: 1. Mite…Might, 2. Sighted…Cited, 3. Seer…Sear, 4. Pail…Pale, 5. Eye…Aye  

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…

Which country, from group A, belongs in group B?

GROUP A

Australia
Cyprus
France
Great Britain
Hong Kong
Japan

GROUP B

United States
China
Egypt
Kuwait
Norway 

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Answers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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