Welcome, to Thursday May 20th. Ponderings thoughts for the day.
Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? 
 
If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

You know how most packages say “Open here”. What is the protocol if the package says, “Open somewhere else”?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why isn’t “palindrome” spelled the same way backwards?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it’s called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it’s called cargo? Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Thursday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!    

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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? “I have to crack this guy. I mean this is Defcon 5, and I have to do something truly appalling. It’s not funny.”   

Answer: How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. The plot of the 2003 film, “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days”, revolved around journalist, Andie Anderson (Kate Hudson), and advertising executive, Benjamin Barry’s (Matthew McConaughey), attempts to climb their own respective career ladders. Andie, in an attempt to prove herself worthy of writing about more serious topics, agreed to write an article entitled “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days”. Meanwhile Ben, in an attempt to secure a coveted diamonds advertising campaign, told his boss that he could make any woman fall in love with him in ten days. The pair’s paths soon crossed, and each one, unbeknown to the other, resolved to use their newfound friend in order to achieve their own ends. Andie said the above quote to her two friends, Michelle and Jeanie following numerous unsuccessful attempts to get Ben to break up with her. Baffled and bemused, Andie just could not understand why Ben would put up with her embarrassing, possessive and sometimes downright humiliating behaviour.   

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “I’m Henry the 8th I am. Henry the 8th I am I am. I got married to the widow next door. She’s been married seven times before.”

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Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007, try and identify which song or which artist.” “I loved you with a fire red, now it’s turnin’ blue and you say sorry, you’re not the angel Heaven let me think was you”   

ANSWER: “Apologize” – OneRepublic. Timbaland made a remix of this song.         

Thursday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007 try and identify which song or which artist.” “She’s her daddy’s girl and her mama’s world she deserves respect, that’s what she’ll get, ain’t it son now y’all run along and have some fun”

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Wednesday’s Quizzler is..  

Find 17 creatures in this paragraph.
Kneel in the kayak grasping the boat, but don’t wrench the bullion or scowl at the chart. Behind the taped and sealed planter is a benevolent collier. The foxglove is in the bath. 

ANSWER: Eel, yak, asp, boa, wren, bull, cow, ape, seal, ant, vole, collie, fox, bat, ox, lion, owl (plus char, hart and hind for three bonus points, but these are more difficult. Char is a fish, related to trout and/or salmon and the hart is a kind of deer, while the hind is either a fish or a deer, depending on your usage.)        

Thursday’s Quizzler is…  

Each of the following song titles starts with the letter C. Can you decode them? Each of the songs is in the form of an anagram.

1. A Scrapheap Venom Gun

2. Aching Scars

3. Facial Grin Roils

4. Cricked Cool Or

5. Car Yarn Zit 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. CARRIE PALOMBO AND SWEETJAZZ5!  GREAT JOB LADIES!  

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Answers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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