Welcome, ‏to Thursday October 7, 2010.  Books on Tape We Don’t Want to Hear……….

1. The Communist Manifesto as read by Ronald Reagan

2. The Torah as read by Louis Farrakhan

3. The Koran as read by Sammy Davis Junior

4. The Bible as read by Madeleine Murray O’Hare

5. Walden as read by James Watt

6. The Anarchist’s Cookbook as read by Theodore Kaczinsky

7. How To win Friends and Influence People as read by Dennis Rodman

8. Europe on $10 a Day as read by Steve Forbes

9. The Godfather as read by John Gotti

10. Mr. Boston’s Bar Guide as read by Ted Kennedy

11. Heather has 2 Mommies as read by Jesse Helms

12. The Diary of Anne Frank as read by Jesse Jackson

13. The Physician’s Desk Reference as read by Dr. Jack Kevorkian

14. Catcher in the Rye as read by Mark Chapman

15. Uncle Tom’s Cabin as read by George Wallace

17. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus as read by 2 Live Crew

18. The Cat in the Hat as read by BF Skinner

19. Where the Wild Things Are as read by Michael Jackson

20. A Rumor of War as read by Bill Clinton

21. Presumed Innocent as read by OJ Simpson

22. The Joy of Cooking as read by Karen Carpenter

23. Bridges of Madison County as read by Howard Stern

24. I’m Ok You’re Ok as read by Rush Limbaugh

25. The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test as read by Bill Bennett

26. No One Gets Out of Here Alive as read by Kurt Cobain

27. Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail as read by Richard Nixon

28. Moby Dick as read by Jonah

29. The Pledge of Allegiance as read by Mahmud Abdul Rauf

30. Fear of Flying as read by Ron Brown

31. Thirty Days to a Stronger Vocabulary by Homer J. Simpson

32. Success for Dummies as read by Ross Perot
   
Hey I’m just saying! Have a interesting Thursday people, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!   

Q u o t e s  o f  t h e  d a y !  

“That night is the most romantic we guys get. I remember
when I asked my wife to marry me, I got down on my knee and
I was shaking a little stick and I went, ‘Ooops, that’s not
the color we’re looking for, is it, Honey?’ I get teary-eyed
just thinking about it.” –Jack Coen 
 
“If a woman tells you she’s twenty and looks sixteen, she’s
twelve. If she tells you she’s twenty-six and looks twenty-
six, she’s darn near forty.” –Chris Rock 
 
“My mother wanted me to go to church to meet women. That’s
wrong, ain’t it? ‘Praise the Lord! Hey, how ya doing? Nice
dress. Look, I’m going to go over there and get some of
this wine and crackers, want some?'” –Warren Hutcherson 
 

G u a r a n t e e d  t o  R o l l  Y o u r  E y e s 

A crab and a lobster are secretly dating. Pretty soon, the lobster tires of the lying and tells her father, who then forbids her to see the crab anymore. 
“It’ll never work, honey.” he says to her. “Crabs walk sideways and we walk straight.” “Please,” she begs her father. “Just meet him once. I know
you’ll like him.” Her father finally relents and agrees to a one-time meeting, and she runs off to share the good news with her crab sweetie. The crab is so excited he decides to surprise his beloved’s family. He practices and practices until he can finally walk straight! On the BIG day, he walks the entire way to the lobster’s
house as straight as he can. Standing on the porch, and seeing the crab walking towards him, the lobster dad yells to his daughter….. 
“I knew it! Here comes that crab and he’s drunk!”  

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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? “Hey listen, Sparky. I have a masters in journalism from Columbia, my boss loves me, and if I do it her way for a while, I can write about whatever I want.” “Like shoes?”

Answer: How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days! “How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days” is a great film about a newspaper article writer, Andie Anderson, who decides to date a guy and then drive him away in just 10 days by making lots of mistakes in her relationship that many women make. She does this so she can write an article on it. Andie says the first quote to Ben, who is the guy she starts dating. Ben, who is just getting to know Andie, replies “Like shoes?”. However, Andie is actually interested in writing about politics. Andie is only dating Ben because she is writing about whatever her boss wants until she is given the freedom to write about something other than dating, gossip, and clothes. Ben does not know Andie well so he thinks that Andie is like a stereotypical woman who is just interested in things like clothes, makeup and shoes. Andie does not know that Ben had just made a bet with his friends, which involves him trying to make a woman (he chose Andie) fall in love with him in 10 days. At the same time, Andie is trying to drive him away!   

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “You know, most kids hope for a car for their 16th birthday, not a country!” and “This is between a waltz and a tango.” “It’s a wango?” 

TODAY’S MOVIE TRIVIA DIVA AWARD GOES TO MS. CARRIE PALOMBO! YOU KNOW YOUR MOVIES! GREAT JOB CARRIE!

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Wednesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005, try and identify which song or which artist.”  “Everybodys trying to be living like a celebrity, do what they see on MTV”

ANSWER: The song is “Baby its You” and it is Jojo’s second single off her first album. 

Thursday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005 try and identify which song or which artist.” “Put your back in motion”?

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Wednesday’s Quizzler is..  

For each of the following four words, come up with another English word that uses all THE SAME letters but in a different order.

The four words you come up with will rhyme with one another.

ONSET
NEWS
WRONG
HORNET

ANSWER: STONE, SEWN, GROWN, THRONE
  

Thursday’s Quizzler is… 

The answers to each of the clues below are words that could have an alternate definition if the words were read incorrectly. For example, if the word “coward” was incorrectly read as having “co-” as a prefix to the word “ward,” its definition could be “to jointly parry or keep something away.” Can you figure out the mispronounced prefixes that could have the definitions given below?

1. a small, 3-chambered vessel for holding medicines
2. the stride that comes before running with long, smooth bounds
3. to unite together again for a special purpose
4. two buildings or rooms used for the retail sale of goods
5. a particle of matter that is not an electrically charged atom or group of atoms
6. to commit a transgression against God again

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER AWARD GOES TO MS CARRIE PALOMBO AND SWEETJAZZ5! INCREDIBLE SOLVING LADIES!  

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Answers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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