WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED: Men Are Just Happier People– Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks and
engines. A ten-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can “do” your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier.  Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy reading it. That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Wednesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a
rock.” – Thomas Jefferson

“Chess is as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you can find
outside an advertising agency.”  – Raymond Chandler

“Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.” – Sir Richard
Steele

“I never went to the prom, which was probably for the best because the only person who asked me to go was
the janitor.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“Country music resonates with Scottish people getting drunk, getting your heart broken, and getting drunk again.” -Craig Ferguson

“Subway sandwich shops are testing out several upscale restaurants called Subway Cafes. They feature wood paneling, lounge seating, and other things to
distract you from the tuna fish being served with an ice-cream scoop.” -Jimmy Fallon

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s

A man goes to the doctor with a swollen foot. After a careful examination, the doctor gives the man a pill big enough to choke a horse. “I’ll be right back with some water,” the doctor tells him. The doctor has been gone a while and the man loses patience. He hobbles out to the drinking fountain, forces the pill down his throat and gobbles down
water until the pill clears his throat. He hobbles back into the examining room. Just then the doctor comes back with a bucket of warm water. “Ok, after the tablet dissolves, soak that foot for about 20 minutes.”

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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? ‘I just hope we don’t end up on Mars, surrounded by millions of little squashy guys.’ Answer: E.T.

Wednesdays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from?? ‘You’re very lucky – with Fraulein Helga it was a snake.’

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Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 90s -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “I went to a shrink to analyze my dreams, he said it’s lack of sex that’s bringing me down.” Answer: Green Day Lyrics from the song “Basket Case”, off their 1994 album “Dookie”.

Wednesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 90s -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “Can we forget about the things I said
when I was drunk, I didn’t mean to call you that.”

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Tuesday’s Quizzler is..

Professor C. D. Rock ran out of teasers, so he went to Teaserville to buy some more. After arriving there he went to 6 different stores. He first went to the “Theater” to buy some teasers about movies. He then went to the “ER Hospital” to buy teasers about health, and the human body. Then he went to, in order, the “Art Center,” the “Supermarket,” and the “Energy Plantation.” He then went to one last store. It was one of the following:
A. Library
B. High School
C. Dance Arena
D. Saloon
E. Dog Pound
F. Railroad Station
G. Petting Zoo
H. Carnival
Can you figure out which place Professor C. D. Rock visited lastly?

Answer: F. Railroad Station. The first letter of each place he went to spells out the
word “teaser.” Theater, Er Hospital, Art Center, Supermarket, Energy Plantation, Railroad Station

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…

Who can’t live without Spell Check in their email or word
software? It’s a great tool…

Unless you are poor Paula Abdul who transforms into “Pail Abut” when
the Spell Checker has at her.

The following Music Stars have been Spell Checked and are ready for you to
uncover their true identities.

1. Keen Chimney

2. Bayonet Knowledge

3. Retching Wilson

4. Jousting Tumblers

5. Went Steamy

6. Madden

7. Tubby Kith

8. Pariah Curry

9. Rebel Mentioned

10. Cozy About

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! SUPER SOLVE BANKS!

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Answers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to
receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/