WELCOME to Monday, August 29, 2011. Ponderings………

Why are there 5 syllables in the word “monosyllabic”?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
If “con” is the opposite of “pro,” then what is the opposite of progress? Congress!
Why do we wait until a pig is dead to “cure” it?
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
War doesn’t determine who’s right, just who’s left

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a happy Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH
IT UP! Peace I am outta here! Eucman

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A friend is someone who’s there when he needs you” – Anon

“Committee- a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours.” – M. Berle

“I’m gonna live forever, or die trying.”- Joseph Heller (Catch 22)

“Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law.”- Hubert Humphrey

“Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do.” Ronald Reagan

“Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder”- Anon 

Spit happens (on a baby’s bib)

“I am nobody, Nobody is perfect, Therefore, I must be perfect!” – Anon

“Some people say that one’s personality is reflected off of their car… Well, I have no car.” – Anon 

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s

An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog.  As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?” “I sure did,” responded the pessimist. “He can’t
swim.”

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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?

What movie is this quote from??? ‘Don’t you know a kid always wins against two idiots?’ Answer: ‘Home Alone 2’! This one should have been fairly easy. Kevin said this to the two bumbling burglars.

Mondays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from?? ‘Chief I can’t tell if he’s really smart or really dumb.’

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Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 90s -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “We are the very hurt you sold. And
what’s the worst you take from every heart you break?” Answer: “Helena”- My Chemical Romance. “We are the very hurt you sold. And what’s the worst you take from
every heart you break. And like the blade you stain, Well I’ve been holding on tonight.” This song is from the CD “Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge”. My Chemical Romance’s other CDs include “I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love” and “The Black Parade”.

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 90s -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “My candle shines without a doubt, but
the wind in your wings blows them out.”

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Friday’s Quizzler is….

As you are reading this message, you will notice some spelling errors. Do not be frigtened, however. This is how you must anelyze: First, find al of the missing, repeated, or incorrect letters.  Second, alow yurself to look at these and look at the wword that is represinted. Finally, tell me a numbur that most commonnly is associated with the word.
Good luck.

Answer: Missing,
Repeated, and Incorrect Letters: H-A-L-L-O-W-E-E-N
Word: Halloween. Number: 31 (Halloween is the 31st of October)

Monday’s Quizzler is…

Below are ten clues, each of which relates to the first line of a different Christmas carol or song. Unlike the title of the teaser, these clues only have the first letters of each
of the words.  Can you figure out what songs they are?

1. CROAOF

2. IDOAWC

3. RTRNRHAVSN

4. GGROBAR

5. IHABCWY

6. ISMKSC

7. OTFDOCMTLGTM

8. FTSWAJHS

9. IBMBOJHSSOM

10. JBJBJBR

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Answers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this
email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/