WELCOME to Tuesday, December 6, 2011.  Insults 101.      

Driving with two wheels in the sand.
Dropped his second stage too soon.
Dumb as asphalt / dirt / a mud fence / a stump / a sack of hammers.
Dumber than a chicken / box of hair/rocks.
During evolution his ancestors were in the control group.
Ears are redirected to /dev/null.
Easier to count the bricks left than the bricks missing.
Echoes between the ears.
Eight pawns short of a gambit.
Elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor / penthouse.
Elevator goes all the way to the top but the door doesn’t open.
Elevator is on the ground floor and he’s pushing the Down button.
End of season sale at the cerebral department. — Gareth Blackstock
Enjoys listening to telemarketers.
Enough sawdust between the ears to bed an elephant. 
That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Tuesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman! 

QUOTES OF THE DAY….

“Congress may pass a law that would result in TV networks that broadcast indecency being even stiffly penalized.

In fact, it is going to cost us 500 more bucks because I said stiffly penalized.” –Craig Ferguson

“One of the holiday decorations at the White House is a 400-pound gingerbread house. Isn’t that nice?

And in front of that is a 400-pound ginger bread ‘foreclosed’ sign.” -Conan O’Brien

“Cyber Monday is a day that every store online puts everything on sale. It’s basically

Black Friday for people too lazy to put on pants.” -Jimmy Kimmel

G U A R A N T E D  T O  M A K E  Y O U  L A F F….

 A graphic designer was on the phone with his client. Designer: Hi. I’m just updating the copy for your form and was wondering if you meant to say ‘programs’ for the third question. Client: No! What I sent along was completely accurate. Just copy it over exactly as it says. I’ll explain it nice and slowly for you. Designer: ‘Please indicate which pogroms you’ve attended’? Client: Yeah, that should be programs.

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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? “This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let’s not bicker and argue about who killed who.”  Answer: Monty Python and the Holy Grail. This movie came out in 1975 and is funny, quotable lines from beginning to end. It seems people either think this is one of the funniest movies ever made or the stupidest there is really no in between for this type of humor. This particular line is the Swamp King speaking to the wedding party and guests after they shout that Launcelot has killed the bride’s father. Sir Launcelot had just stormed the castle and hacked his way through the crowd under the mistaken belief that he was rescuing a princess, when it was really a prince who had sent out a message about being forced to marry against his will.

Tuesdays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from?? “Life’s not fair is it? You see, I…well I shall never be king. And you… shall never see the light of another day. Adieu!”
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Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, this quiz features popular songs from 2008/2010, try and identify which song or which artist. “I kissed a girl and I liked it, The taste of her cherry chapstick….Answer: cherry Chapstick. These lyrics are from the hit song “I Kissed A Girl” by Katy Perry. This song topped #1 on the iTunes’ “Top Songs” list in June 2008. In just 7 weeks, the single “I Kissed A Girl” sold a rousing 988,000 downloads.

Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2009/2010, try and identify which song or which artist. “He’s all that”?

TODAY DEFINTIONS DIVA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD! GREAT SINGSOLVING KIM!

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