by eucman

Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Thursday, December 22, 2011. Signs You’ve Had Too Much Holiday Cheer…… 

1. You strike a match and light your nose.
2. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad.
3. You hear a duck quacking and it’s you.
4. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant.
5. You refill your glass from the fish bowl.
6. You hear someone say, “Call a priest!”
7. You start kissing the portraits on the wall.
8. You complain about the small bathroom after emerging from the closet.
9. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket.
10. You tell everyone you have to go home… and the party’s at your place.
11. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off.
12. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch.
13. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room… and realize you’re in front of the hall mirror.
14. You take out your handkerchief and blow your ear.
15. You suggest everyone stand and sing the national budget.     That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY….

“Ninety-nine percent of the eggnog purchased all year is purchased during the week before Christmas. And 99 percent of that eggnog is poured down the drain during the week after Christmas.” -Jimmy Kimmel

 

“There’s only a few days left to finish your Christmas shopping. Or as most guys look at it, ‘There’s still a few days left to start my Christmas shopping.'” -Jimmy Fallon
“Here’s a fun fact: You know how much Christmas wrapping paper is on the average roll? Four inches less than you need.” -Jay Leno

G U A R A N T E D  T O  M A K E  Y O U  L A F F….

Every December it was the same excruciating tradition. Our family would get up at the crack of dawn, go to a Christmas tree farm and tromp across acres of snow in search of the perfect tree. Hours later our feet would be freezing, but Mom would press on, convinced the tree of her dreams was “just up ahead.”
One year I snapped. “Mom, face it. The perfect tree doesn’t exist. It’s like looking for a man. Just be satisfied if you can find one that isn’t dead, doesn’t have too many bald spots and is straight.”

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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? “We’re a long line of Athols.”Answer:Made of Honor. This 2008 movie stars Patrick Dempsey as Tom Bailey, a man who is trying to win over the girl, Hannah (Michelle Monaghan), who he has been best friends with for a long time, and who, he realizes, is the love of his life just as she is about to get married to Colin McMurray (Kevin McKidd). The wedding is to be in Scotland, so Hannah, Tom, who Hannah has designated as her maid of honor, and Colin all go to Scotland in preparation for the wedding. This quote is said during Colin’s family dinner in Scotland by Colin’s mother, played by Hannah Gordon, referencing the reasoning for her choice of baby name (Athol) for when Colin and Hannah have a baby boy. Her lispy accent, however, induces snickering from Tom and Hannah.

Thursdays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??“Get out of my way, son. You’re using my oxygen.”

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Wednesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, this quiz features popular songs from 2008/2010, try and identify which song or which artist. “Potential Breakup Song”?Answer: Aly & AJ. “Potential Breakup Song” is on the album “Insomniatic”.

Thursday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2009/2010, try and identify which song or which artist.“You’ll know the vertigo is gonna go.” 

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Wednesday’s Quizzlers is……….

 

An anagram is a word or phrase formed by rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. For example, rearrange “none” to get “neon”. It is not considered an anagram if you exchange a letter with the same letter. For example, switching the n’s with each other in “noun” does not give an anagram. Even though a word is not considered an anagram of itself, your task is to find a word that is an anagram of itself. If you can do the seemingly impossible once, you might as well find a second word that is an anagram of itself.
ANSWER: Both “stifle” and “filets” are anagrams of “itself”.  

 

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is………..
Fred and his wife, Nikita, were having a conversation about words while on a road trip.
Fred said, “I am thinking of a devilishly tricky word that has five consonants in a row.”
Nikita countered with, “That’s a good one, but people are lining up to find a word with five vowels in a row.”
What words were Fred and Nikita thinking of?
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Answers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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