WELCOME to Monday February 27, 2012. For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously!
1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set
2. A day without sunshine is like, night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
5. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
7. I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
8. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
9. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges
10. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
11. Remember half the people you know are below average.
12. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
13. Nothing is fool-proof to a talented fool.
14. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
15. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
16. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
17. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
18. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
19. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
20. I intend to live forever – so far so good.
That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
“I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.” Rodney Dangerfield
“People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don’t realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world,” Calvin.
“Isn’t your pants’ zipper supposed to be in the front?” Hobbes. Calvin and Hobbes.
“Cheese…milk’s leap toward immortality.” Clifton Fadiman.
“Never stand between a dog and the hydrant.” John Peers.
“You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you’ll be afraid to cough.” Pearl Williams.
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
The Pope was getting into his limo one night when he turned to the limo driver and said, “Before I die, I would love to drive this beautiful limo just once.” “Well, here,” the limo driver says, “Take the wheel, Your Holiness!” Further down the road, the limo is stopped by a policeman who looks in the window, goes back to his squad car, calls dispatch and says, “I just pulled over someone real important and I don’t know what to do.” “Well, who is it?” his dispatcher says, “The mayor? The governor? The president?” “I don’t know,” the officer responds, “but the Pope’s his chauffer!”
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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from???‘No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!’ Answer: Goldfinger. Said by Auric Goldfinger to James Bond.
Mondays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from?? ‘When I die, bury me upside down so the world can kiss my behind.’
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Friday’s Quizzler is………. Below are 3 pairs of words. Find the words that fit in the middle of each pair of words to create two new words, one front-ended and one back-ended. Example: EVER – ______ – HORN Answer: EVER – GREEN – HORN
1. FORE – __________ – HOOD 2. WOOD – __________ – FALL 3. GOLD – __________ – LAYER
ANSWER: 1. FORE – MAN – HOOD, 2. WOOD – LAND – FALL, 3. GOLD – BRICK – LAYER
Monday’s Quizzlers is………. The following quotes are all by Forrest Gump (played by Tom Hanks), can you figure them out? They all use the same code.
XT XSXS SCPSTF FSJM CJKD PSF CJLD S OZV ZK IGZIZCSNDF. TZE RDWDU LRZP PGSN TZE’UD AZRRS ADN.
XT RSXD’F KZUUDFN AEXQ. QDZQCD ISCC XD KZUUDFN AEXQ.
J’X RZN S FXSUN XSR, OEN J LRZP PGSN CZWD JF.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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