by eucman

Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Friday March 2, 2012.  Friday’s Ponderings…..          It’s a small world. So you gotta use your elbows a lot. This land is your  land. This land is my land. So stay on your land. How come wrong numbers  are never busy? Do people in Australia call the rest of the world “up  over”? Does that screwdriver belong to Philip? Does killing time  damage eternity? Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why is it called  lipstick if you can still move your lips? Why is it that night falls but  day breaks? Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Weekend people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY

“This week an Occupy Wall Street protester gave birth in the back of a taxi. The baby loves breast milk � as long as it’s not the 1 percent.” -Jimmy Fallon

“I was homeschooled, which meant that I had to bully myself.” -Dave Letterman

 “A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between 25 and 8,000 years old.” -Craig Ferguson

“The CEO of Pizza Hut said that when he was in college, he used to bring his dates to Pizza Hut. When asked where he brought them on the second date, he said there were no second dates.” -Conan O’Brien

 “A company in the U.K. is selling a new device that lets you know if you’re driving badly. It’s called a windshield.” -Jimmy Fallon

 “The Wallenda kids started walking the tightrope at age 4. To do something like that when you’re that age, you need three things: courage, resolve, and horrible parents.” -Craig Ferguson

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had
been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so
I sought my husband’s advice. “What do you think?” I asked. “Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?”
“Better get a bikini,” he replied. “You’d never get it all in one.”
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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? ‘You broke out of jail?’ ‘No, we released ourselves on our own recognizance.’  Answer: Raising Arizona. Hi’s friends tell his wife this after they’ve  broken out of jail and came to their house to stay a while. 

Fridays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from?? ‘Lose it? I didn’t ‘lose’ it. I not ike whoops where’d my job go. IQUIT!’

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Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
Can you decipher the following common phrase? T M C A U O H S M W T E

ANSWER: What goes up must come down.

Friday’s Quizzlers is……….

Find the words that fit in the spaces below, and make two new words.
Example:   Air    PORT    Wine
1.   Swimming  _ _ _ _  Table
2.   Free  _ _ _  Ward
3.   Wisdom  _ _ _ _ _  Ache
4.    Bear _ _ _ _ Up
5.    Watch _ _ _ _ _  Gang

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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