by eucman

Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Wednesday March 21, 2012.  Truths about growing old…….  

1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.

2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you’re down there. (My favorite…)

4) You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

5) It’s frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

6) Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Wednesday people, and whatever you  do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY

“The spirit of resistance to government is so valuable on certain occasions,
that I wish it always to be kept alive.” – Thomas Jefferson

“A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along
with people, of getting things done.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
“A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what’s going on.” – William S. Burroughs

“Spring break is the week where college students get a much-needed

break from binge drinking in Nebraska and go to
binge drink in Florida.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“Police across the country say there’s been a spike in criminals
stealing Tide laundry detergent. So I guess all those commercials
that say it cleans blood stains are really paying off.” -Jay Leno

“A new report found that 20 percent of people over 45 had to dip
into their retirement savings last year. And the other 80 percent
said, ‘retirement savings?'” -Jimmy Fallon 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

A woman visited a psychic of some local repute. In a dark and gloomy room,
gazing at the Tarot cards laid out before her, the Tarot reader delivered the bad
news: “There is no easy way to say this so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to
be a widow. Your husband will die a violent death this year.” Visibly shaken, the
woman stared at the psychic’s lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then
down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had
to know. She met the Tarot reader’s gaze, steadied her voice and asked,
“Will I get away with it?”
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Tueday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from ‘I think you have a lot of special gifts!  Answer: Pretty Woman. Another great love story! Starring my favorite  actress Julia Roberts, Richard Gere (they make a cute couple), and Jason  Alexander.

 Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? Look at my face. I’m not very mad.’

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Tuesday’s Quizzler is………. My local bus company has recently expanded and no longer has enough room for all of its buses. Twelve of their buses have to be stored outside. If they decide to increase their garage space by 40%, this will give them enough room for all of their current buses, plus enough room to store another twelve in the future. How many buses does the company currently own?

Answer: 72 buses. They have enough room for 60 of these, expanding the 60 capacity by 40% will give them enough room

for 84 – which we know is 12 more than their current count.

Wednesday’s Quizzlers is……….
These word pairs are not in relation to each other, but if you find their synonyms, the two words will rhyme.
Example : Over-sized Feline = Fat Cat
Kiss Dog Funny Cat Movie Monster Unusual Rabbit Copper Teapot Wedding Limo Untamed Minor
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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