WELCOME to Monday May 7, 2012. Pondering….

Why do they report power outages on TV?

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren’t
afraid to have a Chapter 11?

I asked my wife why there were so many dings on the driver’s side of her
Mercedes and she said the brakes must be bad on that side.

After you lose an election, will they let you back into all the exclusive clubs
you resigned from?

This is the only place in the country where people pull over and stop for a
funeral, but speed up to cut off an ambulance or a firetruck.

I went out today and bought everything I’ve been wanting, because now that
the elections are over, I know that the politicians are going to take care of the middle class.

The best advice for teenagers is, leave home now while you still know everything.

I really feel sorry for Madonna’s baby, having to grow without a last name.

Is it a law of nature that women have to sneeze as soon as they apply their mascara?

The two biggest problems in America are making ends meet and making meetings end.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Monday people, try
enjoying your day, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one,
you‘ll become a philosopher … and that is a good thing for any man. – Socrates

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet!
They’re about to announce the lottery numbers. – Homer Simpson

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. – A. Whitney Brown

Personally, I don’t think there’s intelligent life on other planets. Why should other
planets be any different from this one? – Bob Monkhouse

I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty. – Imelda Marcos

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. – Walt Disney
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up,
he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. “I have just
the thing,” says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. “Just place
this between your cheek and gum.” The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber
proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client
asks in garbled speech. “And what if I swallow it?”

“No problem,” says the barber. “Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does.”

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “When an individual acquires great power,
the use or misuse of that power is everything. Will it be used for the greater good
or will it be used for personal or destructive ends? Now this is a question we must all ask ourselves.”

Answer: X-Men: The Last Stand. This quote is said by Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart) as he addresses students at his school for mutants. He is attempting to keep them from abusing the gifts they have received. He wants them to use their powers for the well-being of others instead of for self-gain. The movie costars Hugh Jackman, Sir Ian McKellan, and Halle Berry. It is the third installment of the “X-Men” movies. In this one, the X-Men must fight one of their former teammates, Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), who has trasferred to Magneto’s (Sir Ian McKellan) side. Magneto attempts to defy the company who has invented what they call a cure for the mutant gene. Wolverine (Jackman), Storm (Berry), Rogue (Anna Paquin) and Iceman (Shawn Ashmore) must fight Magneto before he ends the human race. The trilogy follows a group of good mutants as they fight to stop evil mutants from taking their revenge on the humans who have shunned them. The good mutants must also resist the prejudice coming from humans, who do not realize that these are the creatures protecting them from harm.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “I could more easily forgive his vanity had he not wounded mine.”

Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Take the list of words below and arrange them into 3 sentences that all have something
in common. Each word is only used once for each time it appears in the list. Punctuation
is not an issue in this teaser in the initial placement of words. Only names are capitalized to start with.
DAD, LET, LETS, LEW, MARGE, MISSES, NO, NORAH, ORDERED, ROSES, SEE, SHARON’S, SIMON, TELEGRAM, TELL, WE’LL,
What are the sentences and what do they have in common?
ANSWER: 1: MARGE LETS NORAH SEE SHARON’S TELEGRAM.
2: WE’LL LET DAD TELL LEW.
3: NO MISSES ORDERED ROSES, SIMON.

All three sentences, when correctly placed, are palindromes. They read the same backward and forward.

Monday’s Quizzlers is……….

What phrase is this?

Interrogator.”Who stole the gold?”

Parsley.”…”

Sage. “…”

Rosemary. “…”

Thyme. “It was Basil.”

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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