WELCOME to Friday May 10, 2012. Mothers Day Gift?
What a mother’s day gift to give! Will do this guy say to his mother? “Mom I’m really sorry, I had on clean underwear but they blew up! I can’t figure out who the idiot was that they convinced to wear an underwear bomb! Did they place a sign for people who want their private parts blown up along with a trip to heaven? I just can’t imagine a more painful way to die. What could be going through your mind that could make you want to even blow yourself up in the first place? Now this is really a serious matter, first they convince you to kill yourself, they convince you to blow yourself up in the process, then they convince you to wear exploding underwear so you blow up your private parts first. Really people we need to think about how we want to be remembered in history, do you really want your grandkids to remember you as the man who blew up his underwear? That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Mothers day weekend people, enjoy yourself, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
“A team of British engineers have developed a car that runs on human waste. I’ll bet that
new car smell doesn’t last very long.” -Jay Leno
“The federal government has a new plan that will let people send texts to 911. Yeah, it’s a
little frustrating when you try to text, ‘Burglar! Please hurry!,’ and it auto-corrects to,
‘Burger, please. Hungry.'” -Jimmy Fallon
“The original Avengers comic has a superhero called Ant-Man. They didn’t put him in the movie, but Ant-Man would have been awesome. He could solve any problem, right any wrong, provided it took place at a picnic.” -Craig Ferguson
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
‘Writing: For the Sell of It‘ was the theme of our community college’s annual writers’ conference. When I called a widely published author and asked him to be our keynote speaker, my request was met with a long silence. He finally said, “I don’t know what I would say to that audience.” “You’re just being modest,” I replied. “I’m sure you’re extremely qualified to speak on that subject.”
He suddenly broke into laughter. “I thought you said, ‘Writing for the Celibate!'”
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “I arrived in America’s airport with clothings, U.S dollars
and a jar of gypsy tears to protect me from AIDS.”
Answer: Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan! This quote is, of course, said by Borat. He narrates this as he arrives in New York’s JFK airport. This is one of his more comedic lines. During the film, Borat entertains a fear of gypsies, Jews, and interestingly, cockroaches. The movie is about a man who comes to the United States in the hopes of absorbing some of its cultures and traditions. The movie follows his antics as he adjusts to the extremely different culture of Americans.
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from???
“I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who’s ever lived: I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.”
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
What common phrase is represented by this?
1928: Sliced Bread = 95% Perfect
1938: Nylon Bristle Toothbrush = 90% Perfect
*1959: Barbie Doll = 96% Perfect*
ANSWER: The Best Thing Since Sliced Bread.
Friday’s Quizzlers is……….
The following sentences have two blanks that can be filled with two words that are anagrams of each other. Please find those words.
1. Mark’s math __________ was a mild-mannered man. But one thing he would not tolerate was a __________. He would immediately fail anyone caught doing so.
2. The patient __________ his pain through physical therapy. He had seen enough __________ surgeries to know that too many people elected surgery when they shouldn’t have.
3. After a long and successful career of serving his country, the nation was in shock as the highly regarded __________ was arrested and tried for __________.
HATS OFF TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS FOR SOLVING THE QUIZZLER OF THE DAY! GREAT JOB BANKS!
Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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