Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

WELCOME to Friday August 31, 2012. We all fail sometimes…….

We all fail sometimes. But there’s something about failing with style.
Here are some of the best test paper blunders from the most
clueless – and inventive – of students.

* Classical Studies * Question: Name one of the early Romans’ greatest achievements.
Answer: Learning to speak Latin

* Biology * Question: What is a fibula?
Answer: A little lie

* Classical Studies * Question: What were the circumstances of Julius Caesar’s death?
Answer: Suspicious ones

* Biology * Question: Give an example of a smoking-related disease
Answer: Early death

* Biology * Question: What is a plasmid?
Answer: A high definition television

* Religious Studies * Question: Christians only have one spouse, what is this called?
Answer: Monotony

* Physics * Question: Name an environmental side effect of burning fossil fuels.
Answer: Fire

* Geography * Question: What does the term “lava” mean?
Answer: A pre-pubescent caterpillar

* Geography * Question: The race of people known as Malays come from which country?
Answer: Malaria

* Geography * Question: Name one famous Greek landmark
Answer: The most famous Greek landmark is the Apocalypse

* History * Question: Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed?
Answer: At the bottom.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Memorial weekend people, and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
“A federal watchdog agency says that overlapping and duplicate programs
waste billions of dollars each year. Congress is taking this study so seriously
that they’re ordering a second study to look into it.” -Jay Leno

“Everyone is talking about the voice-control TV. It’s TV that you control with
your voice instead of the back-breaking work of pressing buttons on the remote.” -Craig Ferguson

“A new study found that kids who work more than 20 hours a week at a
job are more likely to get bad grades. On the other hand, China.” -Jimmy Fallon

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
My father and I belong to the religion of Sikhism. We both wear the traditional turban and often
encounter strange comments and questions. Once, in a restaurant, a child stared with amazement
at my father. She finally got the courage to ask, “Are you a genie?” Her mother, caught off guard,
turned red in the face and apologized for the remark. But my dad took no offense and decided to
humor the child. He replied, “Why, yes I am. I can grant you three wishes.”
The child’s mother blurted out, “Really?”

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Greg, what is the worst fraternity on this campus?”
“Well, that would be hard to say, sir. They’re each outstanding in their own way.”

Answer: Animal House! In this scene Faber College Dean Vernon Wormer (John Vernon) is discussing with Omega fraternity house president Greg Marmalard (James Daughton) various bad influences on the Faber College campus, and asks Greg line one. Greg beats around the bush by answering with line two. But Dean Wormer already knows the answer to his question: It’s Delta house, notorious for drunken parties, pranks and abysmally-low school grades. The dean summarizes their contributions to Faber College life as, “Who dropped a whole truckload of fizzies into the swim meet? Who delivered the medical school cadavers to the alumni dinner? Every Halloween, the trees are filled with underwear. Every spring, the toilets explode.” There are so many good quotes in this movie, it’s hard to choose! Here are a few more: “My advice to you is to start drinking heavily.” “Better listen to him, Flounder, he’s in pre-med.” “Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.” Director John Landis confirmed he threw beer bottles near the actors during filming in some interior Delta house scenes to add some “flavor” to the scene!

“Animal House” won a 1979 People’s Choice award but no Oscars. The screenplay for this movie was co-written by Doug Kenny, Harold Ramis and Chris Miller. Co-writer Chris Miller’s own fraternity experiences were the basis of several published stories starting in 1974, and these were turned into the movie. Co-writer Kenny played Stork in the movie (he has the memorable line, “What should we do, you moron?” and leads the marching band down an alley at the homecoming parade at the end of the movie). John Blutarsky, who has the dubious distinction of having a grade average of 0.0, is memorably played by John Belushi.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Anybody know this joint?” “Yeah, sure, I do. It’s perfect for us. A small family place, good food. Everyone minds his business. It’s perfect. Pete, they got an old-fashion’ toilet — you know, the box, and – and – and – ah the chain thing. We might be able to tape the gun behind it.”
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
Change the position of just one of the words below so that all the words are in an alphabetical sequence:
llama, phoenix, hyena, alligator, beaver, elephant, tortoise, antelope

ANSWER: Antelope. Move it from the end to the beginning; the initial letters will then spell ALPHABET

Friday’s Quizzlers is……….
Can you identify the following songs and their artists?

1) Refrain from halting, the first person, immediately.
by Female monarch.

2) Multiple timepieces.
by Low temperature, stage production.

3) Unbleached, natural sweetener.
by Perpetual motion of small rock.

4) Sugary infant, belonging to me.
by Firearms & thorny plants.

5) Refrain from remaining, on your feet, near myself.
by Poisoned insect injection.

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in NEXT TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org.www.hopeBUILD.org.www.Eucmaninc.net.www.wcscatering.com., http://www.Beaumont77.com., ww.schoons.com.,www.awj-law.com.,http://www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com/.,http://cleancomedyguy.com/ http://www.simplycake.biz/www.chrissijforyourhair.com.

Leave a comment