You look a lot like my future wife.
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking you out.
Did they just take you out of the oven? Because you’re hot!
Your body’s name must be Visa, because it’s everywhere I want to be.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald’s, you would be McGorgeous.
Oh, I’m sorry, I thought that was a Braille nametag.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Without my glasses, you couldn’t pass for a female.
You be the tree, and I’ll wrap you like a Koala.
Want to play conductor? You be the engineer and I’ll go choo choo.
What do you like for breakfast?
Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.
I want to call your mother and thank her.
Your daddy must be a thief, because he stole the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes.
Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
(Look at his / her shirt label) When they say, “What are you doing?”, you say, “Checking to see if you were made in heaven.”
There must be something wrong with my eyes, because I can’t take them off you.
All those curves, and me with no brakes.
If I told you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Do you know how to use a whip?
Can you give me directions…to your heart?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?
I hope you know CPR, ’cause you take my breath away.
You look just like Joan Rivers.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful weekend people, and whatever you do,
QUOTES OF THE DAY
Every man`s dream is to be able to sink into the arms
of a woman without also falling into her hands.
Jerry Lewis
Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest
that God can’t help but smile on it.
Josh Billings
I was sued by a woman who claimed that she became pregnant
because she watched me on television and I bent her contraceptive coil.
Uri Geller
Constant complaint is the poorest sort of pay for all of the comforts we enjoy.
Ben Franklin
My wife says I never listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said.
Unknown
Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most!
Unknown
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
WHY did the Chicken cross the road according to DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on ‘THIS’ side of the road before it goes after the problem on the ‘OTHER SIDE’ of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his ‘CURRENT’ problems before adding ‘NEW’ problems.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Meet me in 20 minutes at the corner of El Dorado and Palm.” “Lady, not for a million dollars.”
Answer: The Birdcage! In this scene, ultra-conservative U.S. Senator Kevin Keeley (Gene Hackman) is dressed in drag in an attempt to escape reporters waiting at the Miami female-impersonator nightclub owned by Armand Goldman (Robin Williams). Senator Keeley’s daughter has just gotten engaged to the straight son of Goldman, and Senator and Mrs. Keeley have gone to Miami to meet his parents. However, when the press discovers where he is, they camp out at the entrance hoping for a photograph. Senator Keeley senses a media disaster and tries to escape unnoticed by dressing in drag. In his drag clothes Senator Keeley looks like an unattractive, beefy female. He spots his chauffeur and (hoping for a fast getaway) says line one. The chauffeur (who does not recognize him) says line two.
In the 1997 Academy Awards “The Birdcage” was nominated for one award but didn’t win (although in my opinion Nathan Lane should been nominated for the Oscar for Best Actor in a Supporting Role for his portrayal of Albert Goldman). Lane did win several minor awards for playing that part. Hank Azaria’s portrayal of the gay Guatemalan house boy Agador Spartacus is hilarious. Azaria is perhaps best known to American audiences for the many voices he provides for the U.S. television show “The Simpsons.”
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Would you like a sip of my wine?” “I’ve never had a sip of a gentleman’s wine before.”
[She takes a swig from his bottle] “Ooooh, it’s very potent!”
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
Complete the series by making a selection from the pool.
Series: Hermes, Aphrodite, Gaea, Ares, Zeus, Cronus, Uranus, Poseidon, ?
Pool: Athena, Dionysus, Eros, Hades, Hephaestus, Hera
ANSWER: The series is the equivalent Greek names for the planets, which are Roman. When the Romans assimilated Greek mythology, they renamed many of the Greek gods. Mercury = Hermes Venus = Aphrodite Earth = Gaea * Mars = Ares Jupiter = Zeus
Saturn = Cronus Uranus = Uranus ** Neptune = Poseidon thus Pluto = Hades
* Although earth is not a Roman god, Gaea is Mother Earth in Greek mythology.
** The Romans did not change the name of the Greek Uranus.
Friday’s Quizzlers is……….
Can you find 13 animals hidden in these words?
Pheasantoadderaturtleechareelionewtiger
WELCOME to Friday September 14, 2012. Pick up Lines #101 
The World According to the Eucman! 