WELCOME to Tuesday March 12, 2013. Mixed Metaphors……

English professors love to catch the errors students make in their term papers, and they love nothing better than to catch mixed metaphors. The “friends and survivors” of Calvin College English department collected this list of mixed metaphors and posted them on their web site:

“He swept the rug under the carpet.”

“She’s burning the midnight oil at both ends.”

“It was so cold last night I had to throw another blanket on the fire.”

“It’s time to step up to the plate and cut the mustard.”

“She’s robbing Peter to pay the piper.”

“He’s up a tree without a paddle.”

“Beware my friend…you are skating on hot water.”

“Keep your ear to the grindstone.”

“Sometimes you’ve gotta stick your neck out on a limb.”

“Some people sail through life on a bed of roses like a knife slicing through butter.”

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY
“The federal government has a new plan that will let people send texts to 911. Yeah, it’s a little frustrating when you try to text, ‘Burglar! Please hurry!,’ and it auto-corrects to, ‘Burger, please. Hungry.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Last week horse meat was discovered in IKEA’s meat balls. Today it was discovered in IKEA’s hot dogs. This is making me think twice about taking my family to dinner at a furniture store.” -Conan O’Brien

“New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg has a new crusade. He wants people to stop listening to loud music in their headphones. Wasn’t that the plot of ‘Footloose’?” -Jimmy Kimmel

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from the local shoe repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed that it was over eleven years old. They both laughed and tried to remember which of them might have forgotten to pick up a pair of shoes over a decade ago. “Do you think the shoes will still be in the shop?” Arnold asked. “Not very likely,” his wife said. “It’s worth a try,” Arnold said, pocketing the ticket. He went downstairs, hopped into the car, and drove to the store. With a straight face, he handed the ticket to the man behind the counter. With a face just as straight, the man said, “Just a minute. I’ll have to look for these.” He disappeared into a dark corner at the back of the shop. Two minutes later, the man called out, “Here they are!” “No kidding?” Arnold called back. “That’s terrific! Who would have thought they’d still be here after all this time.” The man came back to the counter, empty-handed. “They’ll be ready Thursday,” he said calmly.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “You be careful out among them English.”

Answer: Witness (1985) The quote is Amish patriarch Eli Lapp’s (Jan Rubes) warning to policeman John Book (Harrison Ford) as Book readies himself for return to his life in the city. The Amish typically refer to any people who are NOT Amish as ‘English’.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads.”

Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Find out what the animals are! (for example, “To run away or escape” could be a “flea”)

1. hair-control foam
2. very exposed
3. tellin’ falsities
4. a lamenting cry
5. a dull person
6. a precious or loved one
7. first you get a parking ticket, then you get this
8. these make up a chain

ANSWER: 1.Moose (Mousse) 2. Bear (Bare) 3. Lion (Lyin’) 4. Whale (Wail) 5. Boar (Bore)
6. Deer (Dear) 7. Toad (Towed) 8. Lynx (Links)

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
Can you decipher this phrase:
O_er_t_o_

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com.