WELCOME to Thursday May 2, 2013. The Amazing Watch….. 

Jack is struggling through a bus station with two huge and obviously heavy suitcases when a stranger walks up to him and asks “Have you got the time?”

 

Jack sighs, puts down the suitcases and glances at his wrist. “It’s a quarter to six,” he says.

 

“Hey, that’s a pretty fancy watch!” exclaims the stranger.

 

Jack brightens a little. “Yeah, it’s not bad. Check this out” – and he shows him a time zone display not just for every time zone in the world, but for the 86 largest metropoli.

 

He hits a few buttons and from somewhere on the watch a voice says “The time is eleven ’til six” in a very West Texas accent.

 

A few more buttons and the same voice says something in Japanese.

 

Jack continues “I’ve put in regional accents for each city”. The display is unbelievably high quality and the voice is simply astounding.

 

The stranger is struck dumb with admiration. “That’s not all,” says Jack. He pushes a few more buttons and a tiny but very hi- resolution map of New York City appears on the display. “The flashing dot shows our location by satellite positioning,” explains Jack.

 

“View recede ten,” Jack says, and the display changes to show eastern New York state.

 

“I want to buy this watch!” says the stranger.

 

“Oh, no, it’s not ready for sale yet; I’m still working out the bugs,” says the inventor.

 

“But look at this,” and he proceeds to demonstrate that the watch is also a very creditable little FM radio receiver with a digital tuner, a sonar device that can measure distances up to 125 meters, a pager with thermal paper printout and, most impressive of all, the capacity for voice recordings of up to 300 standard-size books,” though I only have 32 of my favorites in there so far” says Jack.

 

“I’ve got to have this watch!” says the stranger.

 

“No, you don’t understand; it’s not ready.”

 

“I’ll give you $1000 for it!”

 

“Oh, no, I’ve already spent more than -“

 

“I’ll give you $5000 for it!”

 

“But it’s just not -“

 

“I’ll give you $15,000 for it!” And the stranger pulls out a checkbook.

 

Jack stops to think. He’s only put about $8500 into materials and development, and with $15,000 he can make another one and have it ready for merchandising in only six months.

 

The stranger frantically finishes writing the check and waves it in front of him. “Here it is, ready to hand to you right here and now. $15,000. Take it or leave it.”

 

Jack abruptly makes his decision. “OK,” he says, and peels off the watch.

 

They make the exchange and the stranger starts happily away.

 

“Hey, wait a minute,” calls Jack after the stranger, who turns around warily.

 

Jack points to the two suitcases he’d been trying to wrestle through the bus station.

 

“Don’t forget your batteries. 

 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!  

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY 

 “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.”

– Phyllis Diller

“If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.”

– Mark Twain

“Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.”

– Will Rogers

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

A man is sitting on his couch watching his TV when he hears the doorbell ring. He opens the door, and all he can see is a snail sitting on his front porch. He throws the snail across the street and goes back to watching TV.

A year later, he is again sitting on his couch watching TV when the doorbell rings again. He opens the door to see an angry snail, who yells, “What the Heck was that for??

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?

What movie is this quote from???  “I think I’ve kind of been in a bubble…thinking that fairness was gonna just happen. It’s not. People like me are gonna have to get up off their fathers’ laps and go out and fight for it.”

 

Answer: Hairspray! Tracy said these words to her father, after realising that people like Velma von Tussle, who would always discriminate based on size or skin color, needed to be stopped. The plot of the 2007 film, “Hairspray”, revolved around plump teenager, Tracy Turnblad, and her ambitions to be famous. However after making it onto popular Baltimore dance show, “The Corny Collins Show”, Tracy realised that fairness was a quality that was hard to come by. Thus she made it her mission to try and change things, so that those who had been discriminated against had the chance to achieve their dancing dreams. 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??? “Thrill me, detective.”  

Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….

We meet each other in very quick a motion, 

Some are shocked to see such devotion. 

Other times with others we are 

To be blunt, not quite at par. 

 

It depends whether or not we match, 

If we don’t, then we attach. 

If we do, we stay away, 

But if forced we go affray. 

 

How strange it is, when we’re opposing, 

The gap between us is speedily closing. 

Yet when we are the same, in fact, 

We don’t stay close, we detract.

 

ANSWER: Magnets

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

Imagine a 4X4 crossword grid numbered as follows:

 

1 | 2 | 3 | 4

–

2

–

3

–

4

 

 

Answer the clues to fill it up.

 

ACROSS:

1. What dogs do

2. What fishes do

3. What you do when you eat

4. What you’ll want to do when you find out the answer to this puzzle

 

DOWN:

1. Insects

2. Optical Organs

3. Pester

4. Comfort

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. www.Eucman.freedom10.com.