WELCOME to Friday May 24, 2013.  ….. 

When I was a kid adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up. 

 

What with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year ’round blizzards carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full-time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death! 

 

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way I was going to lay that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they’ve got it! 

 

But…. 

 

Now that I’ve reached the ripe old age of thirty, I can’t help but look around and notice the youth of today. 

 

You’ve got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today don’t know how good you’ve got it! 

 

I mean, when I was a kid we didn’t have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves! 

 

And there was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen! And then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! 

 

And there were no MP3s or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or, we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and mess it all up! 

 

You want to hear about hardship? 

 

We didn’t have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal! 

 

And we didn’t have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was, it could be your boss, your Mom, a collections agent, you didn’t know!!! 

 

You just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! 

 

And we didn’t have any fancy Sony Playstation videogames with high-resolution 3-D graphics! 

 

We had the Atari 2600! With games like “Space Invaders” and “Asteroids”! Your guy was a little square! You had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! 

 

And you could never win, the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died! 

 

Just like LIFE! 

 

When you went to the movie theater, there was no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy sat in front of you, you watched his hairstyle! 

 

And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! 

 

And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning… D’ya hear what I’m saying!?! 

 

We had to wait ALL WEEK! 

 

That’s exactly what I’m talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You’re spoiled! 

 

You guys wouldn’t last five minutes back in 1984! 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Memorial weekend people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman! 

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY 

“A college student in Georgia was worried that his parents would be mad at him for flunking English. So he tried to fake his own kidnapping. The parents figured it out when the ransom note said, ‘We has your son.'” -Conan O’Brien

“Arnold Schwarzenegger has announced he will star in a low-budget horror movie called ‘The Toxic Avenger.’ He wreaks havoc. He’s a monster. I have no idea what he’ll do in the movie.” -Craig Ferguson

“A 19-year-old student in Lawrenceville, Georgia, was failing English and he didn’t want to tell his parents about it. So he faked his own kidnapping. He texted his parents and said he’s been abducted. It sounds like a terrible Liam Neeson movie.” -Jimmy Kimmel

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

Five Jewish men who influenced the history of Western civilization. 

Moses said the law is everything.

Jesus said love is everything. 

Marx said capital is everything. 

Freud said sex is everything. 

Einstein said everything is relative. 

 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?

What movie is this quote from???  “Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. And like that, poof. He’s gone.”

 

Answer: The Usual Suspects! This quote by Verbal Kint (Kevin Spacey) takes place in the scene where Agent Kujan (Chazz Palminteri) is questioning him about the identity of Keyser Soze.  

 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???“Conrad. Let’s have a great Christmas. Let’s have… a great year. Let’s have the best year of our whole lives. We can, you know… this could be the best one ever.”

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

What phrase is shown here?

 ANSWER: Inside Information

(as ducks fly: in formation)

Friday’s Quizzler is……….

Rearrange the letters to form new words, phrases, places, or names.

The words in parentheses are hints.

ONE ON ALP (conqueror)

SEEK A PHRASE (playful fellow)

KNEE CRUTCH ART (great ballet)

NONE MISTER (soup)

TOXIC NAME (April agony)

HE BUGS GORE

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. www.Eucman.freedom10.com.