WELCOME to Monday July 22, 2013. New Age Definitions….
After Marriage: A state in which husband and wife become two sides of a coin, they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”.
Love: Something You can’t buy, but pay dearly for it.
Love Affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.
Marriage: It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master.
Tears: A hydraulic force which makes feminine water power to conquer over masculine will-power.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
If I take care of my character, my reputation will take care of me.
Dwight L. Moody
Love comes unseen; we only see it go.
Austin Dobson
Not everybody trusts paintings but people believe photographs.
Ansel Adams
Oh, the summer night, Has a smile of light, And she sits on a sapphire throne.
Barry Cornwall
An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed.
A. J. Liebling
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
Three mothers were sitting around comparing notes on their exemplary offspring.
“There never was a daughter more devoted than my Alice,” said Mrs. Davis with a sniff. “Every summer she takes me to the Catskills for a week, and every winter we spend a week at Delray Beach .”
“That’s nothing compared to what my Anna does for me,” declared Mrs. Jones proudly. “Every winter she treats me to two weeks in Miami , and in the summer two weeks in the Hamptons, in my own private guest house.”
Mrs. Smith sat back with a proud smile. “Nobody loves her mother like my Jackie does. Nobody.”
“So what does she do?” asked the two women, turning to her.
“Three times a week she gets into a cab, goes to the best psychiatrist in the city, and pays him a hundred and fifty dollars an hour – just to talk about me!”
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children. Do you understand? Morphine is bad for you. Your daughter is out there on the streets waiting for you.”
Answer: The Crow! This quote comes from the scene where Draven (Brandon Lee) squeezes the morphine out of Darla’s (Anna Levine) arm as he reminds her that she has a child hanging out on the street that she needs to take care of.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??? “Insane asylums are filled with people who think they’re Jesus or Satan. Very few have delusions of being a guy down the block who works for an insurance company.”
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
What phrase is this?
Bank for Tigers 4.2% interest rate
Bank for Lions 4.1% interest rate
Bank for Cheetahs 0.0% interest rate
ANSWER: Cheaters never prosper! lit. The cheetah’s bank offers an interest of 0% so any money invested will not accrue any interest and they will not prosper
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Using a combination of letters and/or numbers to sound out the answers, can you solve the clues? (The first one is free)
1. Not difficult – EZ (Easy)
2. Unoccupied
3. To do better than others
4. Defeated
5. A number (use only letters for this one)
6. A sport
7. Freezing
Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com,
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