WELCOME to Monday August 19, 2013. UN Survey….
A survey was conducted by the U.N. The only question asked was, “Would you please give your most honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?”
The survey was a HUGE failure.
In Africa, they did not know what “food” means.
In Western Europe, they did not know what “shortage” means.
In Eastern Europe, they did not know what “opinion” means.
In the Middle East, they did not know what “solution” means.
In South America, they did not know what “please” means.
In Asia, they did not know what “honest” means.
And in the USA, they did not know what “THE REST OF THE WORLD” means.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
My dear friend, clear your mind of can’t.
Samuel Johnson
The quarrels of lovers are the renewal of love.
Jean Racine
Every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it.
Michelangelo
We may brave human laws, but we cannot resist natural ones.
Jules Verne
I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure.
Tommy Cooper
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
A Pastor goes to the dentist for a set of false teeth.
The first Sunday after he gets his new teeth, he talks for only eight minutes.
The second Sunday, he talks for only ten minutes.
The following Sunday, he talks for 2 hours and 48 minutes.
The congregation had to mob him to get him down from the pulpit and they asked him what happened.
The Pastor explains the first Sunday his gums hurt so bad he couldn’t talk for more than 8 minutes. The second Sunday his gums hurt too much to talk for more than 10 minutes. But, the third Sunday, he put his wife’s teeth in by mistake and he couldn’t stop talking…
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Let me see, I know how to fence and you don’t… Or I have class and you don’t. Take your pick.” and “YOU’RE nervous?! An 11 year old is cutting my hair!”
Answer: “The Parent Trap” (1998) is about two twins, Annie and Hallie, who were separated when they were babies, because their parents split up. Elizabeth (the mother) took Annie with her to England, whereas Nick (the father), stayed in California with Hallie. However, Annie and Hallie accidentally meet when their parents both send them to the same camp for the summer and they end up switching places in order to get to know their other parent and bring Elizabeth and Nick back together again!
Annie says both these lines to Hallie when they are at camp. The first quote is said when Annie is comparing how different she is to Hallie, and the second quote is said when Hallie is cutting Annie’s hair to make them look identical so that they can switch places.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??? “What are we going to do about this dinner?” “We have blue soup to start, orange pudding to end, and, well, for a main course you have congealed green gunge.”
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
What have I got?
U Bone
U Bonk
U Bock
U Bick
U Pick
ANSWER: I’ve got a bone to pick with you. lit. The word BONE becomes the word PICK (bone to pick) ‘With’ the letter U (You)
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
A magazine competition invited people to come up with “invented” inventions of the cyber-age.
For example, a solar powered clothes drier (a rope) and a hand-held word processor (a pencil). Can you guess what this is?
It is a portable arcade. A hand-held amusement resource with no cartridges or batteries. Access games of speed, dexterity, memory, cunning. Produce magical effects or construct lofty towers. Some games can increase your income.
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MR. PARKER LOVELACE, MS. ANDREA L. BANKS AND MS. RENNA WILD! SUPER SOLVING JOB PEOPLE!
Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com,
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