Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Friday, June 27, 2014.    

Iphone Short Jokes…..
 
Q: Why is the Apple still reporting record profits? 
A: Because iPhone users are just as oblivious to the looming recession as they are to the people around them! 
 
Q: What is written on Steve Jobs tombstone? 
A: iCame, iSaw, iConquered, iLeft, iCameBack, iThinkDifferent, iMac, iPod, iTunes, iPhone, iPad, iCloud, iRIP 
 
Q: How can you tell which one of your friends has the new gold iPhone 5s? 
A: Don’t worry, they’ll let you know. 
 
Q: Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret? A: They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn’t have a Flash player installed! 
 
Q: How many Apple Iphone early adopters does it take to change a light bulb? 
A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and moan about the lack of obscure features! 
 
Q: What do the latest Iphone applications do? 
A: Whiten teeth and perform lasik eye surgery! 
 
Q: According to Apple what is the leading cause of iphones overheating? 
A: Downloading images of Katy Perry! 
 
Q: What type of a computer does a horse like to eat? 
A: A Macintosh What do you get if you cross an iPhone and a fridge? Cool music. 
 
Q: Why is it so sad that Steve Jobs died? 
A: Everyone at Apple are crying their i’s out! 
 
Q: What happens if you download the Princess Diana screensaver application? 
A: Your iphone will keep crashing! 
 
Q: Why won’t blondes take their iPhones to the bathroom? 
A: Because they don’t want to give away their IP address! 
 
Q: Why is Apple offering a free case for all iPhone 4 buyers? 
A: It doesn’t help with reception, but protects the iPhone when you throw it against the wall after dropping a call! 
 
It was reported this week that Google would soon launch its own cellphone as a challenge to the iPhone. Also a challenge to the iPhone? Making phone calls. 
 
20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please dont let Kevin Bacon die. 
 
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people and 
whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!  
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“Scientists have created a mutant version of the deadly 1918 Spanish flu virus in an effort to better understand how pandemics start. I’m not a scientist, but this is how pandemics start.” -Seth Meyers
“Soccer is one of those things that the rest of the world cares more about than we do – you know, like healthcare, education, gun control.” -Dave Letterman
“Domino’s has a new voice-activated iPhone app that will help customers order pizza. You just speak your order into the phone. Or as that’s called now, ‘ordering a pizza.'” -Jimmy Fallon
 
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

During World War II Richard Wynn, on flight duty with the 8th Air Force Division in Europe was shot down and captured by the Germans. After a year as prisoner of war, he escaped and made his way back to his bomber group in England. One of his first acts there was to hunt up the corporal on duty in the parachute building.

 

“Corporal,” he said, “a year ago I had occasion to use one of the parachutes that your men had packed and I want you to know how delighted I was to find it in perfect working order. I give you my deepest compliments and appreciation.”

 

“You know, Lieutenant, funny thing,” the corporal replied. “In this work we never get any complaints.” 

 

 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from???   ‘Shall we say at the stroke of midnight, pun not intended.’
  
Answer: Cruel Intentions! Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon are married. They met in 1997 at Reese’s 21st birthday party. The quote is said by Sebastian to Blaine about setting up a meeting on his behalf with Greg McConnell.  
 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 
quote from???  ‘Check ya later!’
 
 
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
In this teaser you have been given two (2) clues in each line. Each answer to the clue comprises six (6) letters. Each 6-letter word differs by only one (1) letter, which I have given you. Your task is to discover the answers to the clues provided. The order of the letters do not change.
 
Example:  Remove _ _ _ I _ _ / _ _ _ U _ _ Justify  Answer: E X C (I) S E / E X C (U) S E
 
1. Pliant _ _ _ _ _ E / _ _ _ _ _ Y Stash
 
2. Inundate _ _ _ _ G _ / _ _ _ _ X _ Elegant
 
3. Expenditure P _ _ _ _ _ / L _ _ _ _ _ Spread
 
4. Chevron _ _ _ _ P _ / _ _ _ _ K _ Hit
Answer:  1. Supple Supply  2. Deluge Deluxe  3. Payout Layout  4. Stripe Strike
 
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Which phrase from group B belongs with the words in group A?
Group A
Lonely
Patent
Canines
Freighter
Artwork
Group B
Local Election
News Event
Tax Return
Brainy Teaser
Play Date
 
 
 
 
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! GREAT SOLVING JOB BANKS! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji
 
 
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Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org., http://www.wcscatering.com. Emoji
  

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