Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏

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WELCOME to Friday, September 26, 2014.  

Really?……..

  1. If you’re too open minded, your brains will fall out.
  2. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
  3. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
  4. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
  5. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.
  6. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
  7. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the Escape key.
  8. Everyone has a photographic memory.  Some just don’t have film.Funny Wisdom
  9. You never truly understand something until you can explain it to your grandmother.
  10. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.   

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Friday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!  

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY   

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order. Brian Pickrell

If it weren’t for my lawyer, I’d still be in prison. 

It went a lot faster with two people digging.  Joe Martin

I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.  Clarence Darrow

In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back. Charlie Brown

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.  Reba McEntire

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork. Mae West

After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse. Spike Milligan

He that cannot reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot.  

He that dare not is a slave.  Andrew Carnegie

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

George, Jack and Simon were at a conference together in Chicago and they were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story sky scraper. After a long day of meetings they were upset to hear that the lifts in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room.

George said to Jack and Simon, let’s break the boredom of this horrendous climb by concentrating on something more interesting. I’ll tell jokes for 25 flights, and Jack can sing songs for 25 flights, and Simon can tell sad stories the rest of the way.  At the 26th floor George stopped telling jokes and Jack began to sing.  At the 51st floor Jack stopped singing and Simon began to tell sad stories.   ‘I will tell my saddest story first,’ he muttered gloomily, ‘I left our room key in the car.’

 

Thursday Movie  Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from???  ‘Frank…, you fought with inspiration.’  

Answer:  Bloodsport! Once the Kuma-Tei is over and Frank (Van Damme) is being presented with a sword.

Friday Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 

quote from???  ‘Good…I’m looking for a job with the least amount of responsibility.’

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

Below are incomplete words. Place three (3) letters in each bracket so that you can complete the word on the left and begin the word on the right. Good luck.

unf (_ _ _ ) est

to (_ _ _) tures

hic (_ _ _) ful

eit (_ _ _) etic

fee (_ _ _) eder

he (_ _ _) ful 

Answer: unfold – oldest  topic – pictures  hiccup – cupful  either – heretic  feeble – bleeder  heart – artful 

 

Friday’s  Quizzler is……….

According to U.S. law, there are officially designated days that all U.S. flags are to be flown at half-mast (for example: Memorial Day). The President and state governors also have the right to declare certain days that flags are to be flown at half-mast. 

There is a particular group of U.S. flags that are never lowered to half-mast and appear to “violate” this U.S. Law. These flags were erected by U.S. Military personnel, but those troops will never be accused of doing anything wrong for those violations.

These flags are currently displayed today, and they have been for numerous years. Where is this particular group of flags displayed?

 
 
 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER DIVA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! SUPER SOLVING JOB BANKS! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.  https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.org. Emoji

 

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