According to 100 Women we interviewed… Men Are Like…

 …placemats

they only show up when there’s food on the table.

…mascara

they usually run at the first sign of emotion.

…bike helmets

they’re good in emergencies but usually just look silly. 

…government bonds

they take so long to mature.

…copiers

you need them in reproduction but that’s about it.

…lava lamps

fun to look at it but not all that bright.

…bank accounts

without a lot of money they don’t generate a lot of 

interest. 

…high heels

they’re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

…curling irons

they’re always hot and always in your hair.

…mini skirts

if your not careful they’ll creep up your legs.

…handguns

keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it. 

whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY   

“Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn’t grow up can be vice president.” 

–Johnny Carson 

“My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.” 

–Orson Welles 

“I can think of nothing less pleasurable than a life devoted to pleasure.” 

–John D. Rockefeller  

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

Many people hold down two jobs, so I wasn’t surprised when my hairdresser mentioned to me that he 

also worked part-time at the race track. “That’s interesting,” I said. “What do you do?”

As he finished styling my hair, he replied, “I groom horses.”  

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from???   ‘Did you hear that?’

Answer: Star Wars! Good old C3PO said this when the Star Destroyer chasing them shot down the main reactor. 

Wednesday Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 

quote from??? ‘Is he dead?’

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

Given below are five pairs of words. Each pair sounds similar, but have different meanings (they are homonyms). Can you find them?

Lift high – Bring down, destroy

Plant with ears – Labyrinth

Burial/Cremation formalities – Uses a pen and paper and forms legible words

To communicate with God – Carnivore’s target

Watery part of milk that separates when milk turns to curds – The route or the course traveled from one place to another

Wednesday’s  Quizzler is……….

Take the given words, and by moving a single letter from one word to the other, make a pair of synonyms, or near synonyms. For example, given: Boast – Hip, move the ‘s’ from ‘Boast’ to ‘Hip’ creating two synonyms: Boat – Ship.

1. Died – Ante

2. Laze – Fibre

3. Clock – Lose

4. Font – Heard

5. Snaked – Tripped

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.  https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.org.