WELCOME to FRIDAY June 2, 2023
Here’s The Story……
At age 4 success is not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is having friends.
At age 16 success is having a drivers license.
At age 20 success is having relations.
At age 35 success is having money.
At age 50 success is having money.
At age 60 success is having relations.
At age 70 success is having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is having friends.
At age 80 success is not peeing in your pants.
It all comes full circle, whether you like it or not.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND!, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“A third-grade class in New Jersey recently found a boa constrictor in the back
of their classroom. Even scarier, they DIDN’T find Billy.” -Seth Meyers
“A new survey found that 46 percent of doctors have used Google or Yahoo to
diagnose their patients’ symptoms. Yeah, last time I got sick, my doctor was like,
‘I’m sorry to tell you this, but you have ‘Server Not Responding.'” -Jimmy Fallon
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The Down Side of Cubicles:
- Being told to “Think outside the box” when I’m in the box all day.
- Not being able to check E-mail attachments without first seeing who is behind me.
- Fabric cubicle walls do not offer much protection from any kind of gunfire.
- That nagging feeling that if I press the right button, I will get a piece of cheese.
- Lack of rafters for the noose.
- My walls are too close together for my hammock to work right.
- Women: Darned near impossible to adjust your bra without comment.
- Men: Co-workers tend to stare when you take your pants off.
- 23 power cords, 1 outlet.
- Prison cells are not only bigger, they have beds.
- When tours come thru, I get lots of peanuts thrown at me.
- Can’t slam the door when you quit and walk out. 😳😳😳
Thursday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Now if there’s one thing you can be sure of, it’s that nothing is more powerful than a young boy’s wish. Except an
Apache helicopter. An Apache helicopter has machine guns AND missiles. It is an unbelievably impressive
complement of weaponry, an absolute death machine.”
Answer: Ted!
At the beginning of the film “Ted”, starring Mark Wahlberg who has a talking Teddy Bear as a best friend, actor Patrick Stewart narrates in voice over this quote as the camera pans across a sleeping little boy with his Teddy Bear…a Teddy Bear that will become the foul-mouthed raunchy Ted voiced by Seth McFarlane. Wahlberg’s John Bennett, who was that little boy, had his wish come true and his bear came to life. But the story would lead to John having to decide whether to keep his relationship with Ted or his girlfriend, Lori (Mila Kunis).
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“My love, stay strong and you will do well in life. I love you and my children deeply. Today and tomorrow let each day grow and grow. Keep smiling and never give up even when things get you down. So in closing my love, tonight tuck my children in bed warmly. Tell them I love them, then hug them for me and give them both a kiss goodnight for daddy.”
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
Add one letter to each word below – anywhere in the word – so that each numbered pair becomes two words of opposite meaning. For example, adding P and L to PLUM and SENDER would result in PLUMP and SLENDER.
- BUGLER EXERT
- KID MAN
- STALE SHAY
- RAID SOW
- FLAT SIN
Answer: 1. BUNGLER, EXPERT
- KIND, MEAN
- STABLE, SHAKY
- RAPID, SLOW
- FLOAT, SINK
Friday’s Quizzler is…….
There are 11 body parts that have only 3 letters (no slang allowed). What are they?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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The World According to the Eucman! 