WELCOME to THURSDAY August 10, 2023
Here’s The Story…..
A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie’s house, and grandpa Morris gets out.
The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in
the park…and couldn’t find his way home. ” Oy Morris “, said grandma, ” You’ve been
going to that park for over 30 years ! So how could you get lost ? ” Leaning close to
grandma, so that the policeman couldn’t hear. Morris whispered, ” I wasn’t lost…..
I was just too tired to walk home.” 😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information
about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.”
–Alfred Hitchcock
“Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is
often more important than the outcome.”
–Arthur Ashe
“Never spend your money
before you have it.”
–Thomas Jefferson
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A prisioner in jail received a letter from his wife:
“I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?”
The prisioner, knowing that the prison guards read all the mail, replied in a letter:
“Dear Wife, whatever you do, DO NOT touch the back garden! That is where I hid all the gold.”
A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife:
“You wouldn’t believe what happened. Some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up the whole back garden.”
The prisoner wrote another letter:
“Dear wife, NOW is the best time to plant the lettuce!” 😳😳
Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter.”
Answer: Bull Durham!
Part of a classic lengthy speech by Kevin Costner, who plays catcher (and minor league fixture) Crash Davis in this great sports comedy from the 1980s. Among other things he believes in, well, there’s “the small of a woman’s back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch… and that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.”
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Money won is twice as sweet as money earned.”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
In each sentence below, two words are incomplete. The two words end in the same
three letters, so they look like they should rhyme, but they don’t. See if you can figure out the missing letters in each sentence.
Example: One symptom of bronchitis is a ro___ co___. (The two words are: rough & cough.)
- Now that I can fly a kite, I don’t m___ the w___.
- Children in Alabama could be called the Deep So___ yo___.
- That bully must ce___ to te___ his fellow students.
- By his 18th birthday, the prince had gr___ into his cr___.
Answer: 1. mind wind
- south youth
- cease tease
- grown crown
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
There are 8 different cartoon characters hidden in the paragraph below. Can you find them? The cartoon characters can link between words or any punctuation, such as commas and full stops. I was walking along the street, when I came across a large bell. Even though it was goofy of me, I could have sworn it looked like a sponge. Bob, my good friend, offered to show the bell to me up close, but I had to pass. I’m back home from my strange encounter with a sponge-like bell. Have I possibly gone daffy? Ducking under my table, I spotted another strange thing; a newspaper from a few weeks back. It says Pluto is not a planet anymore? Rubbish! Under my table, I also found a lollipop. Eyeing it closely, I found mold on it! Why do I have these things in my house? It is completely dumb. Of course it is my fault that I don’t throw these things away.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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