WELCOME to FRIDAY August 11, 2023

Here’s The Story…..
A man is sitting in the coach section of a flight from New York to Chicago biting
his fingernails and sweating profusely. Noticing his disturbed expression, a flight
attendant walks over and says, “Sir, can I get you something from the bar to calm you down?”
The man gives a nod of approval while shaking terribly. She comes back with a drink and
he downs it quickly. Ten minutes later, the flight attendant sees the same man shaking and
biting his nails. She brings him another drink which he swallows immediately.
A half hour later she returns to see that the man is shaking uncontrollably, and apparently
crying. “My goodness,” the flight attendant says, “I’ve never seen someone so afraid to fly.”
“I’m not afraid of flying,” says the man sobbing loudly, “I’m trying to give up drinking.”
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT WEEKEND, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Goodwill has returned almost $100,000 in cash that was mistakenly donated to them
in a black duffel bag. A spokesman for Goodwill said, ‘We’re not very bright.'” -Conan O’Brien

“A study showed that every hour of TV you watch after the age of 25 shortens your life
by 22 minutes. That doesn’t sound too bad to me. You’d probably watch TV
with that 22 minutes anyway.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“A 94-year-old man is graduating from West Virginia University. Just imagine how awkward
it’s going to be for the commencement speaker when he says, ‘You have your
whole life ahead of you. Except that dude.'” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Judi and Gayle were at an auto show. There they saw a hot-rod with a jacked up rear end.
“Judi, why is the back end higher than the front?” Gayle asked.
“Don’t you know ANYTHING?” Judi sighed exasperated. “If you’ve got
the back up like that, then you’re always going downhill!” 😳😳😳

Thursday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Money won is twice as sweet as money earned.”

Answer: The Color of Money!
This was the 1986 sequel to 1960’s “The Hustler”. Paul Newman won the Oscar for Best Actor for his portrayal of former pool shark ‘Fast’ Eddie Felson, who attempts to teach the art of hustling to flaky but talented protege Vincent Lauria (Tom Cruise).

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“There’s a force in the universe that makes things happen. And all you have to do is get in touch with it,
stop thinking, let things happen, and be the ball.”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
There are 8 different cartoon characters hidden in the paragraph below. Can you find them? The cartoon characters can link between words or any punctuation, such as commas and full stops. I was walking along the street, when I came across a large bell. Even though it was goofy of me, I could have sworn it looked like a sponge. Bob, my good friend, offered to show the bell to me up close, but I had to pass. I’m back home from my strange encounter with a sponge-like bell. Have I possibly gone daffy? Ducking under my table, I spotted another strange thing; a newspaper from a few weeks back. It says Pluto is not a planet anymore? Rubbish! Under my table, I also found a lollipop. Eyeing it closely, I found mold on it! Why do I have these things in my house? It is completely dumb. Of course it is my fault that I don’t throw these things away.

Answer: Belle (Beauty and the Beast)
Goofy
Spongebob
Simba (The Lion King)
Daffy Duck
Pluto
Popeye
Dumbo

I was walking along the street, when I came across a large BELL. Even though it was GOOFY of me, I could have sworn it looked like a SPONGE. BOB, my good friend, offered to show the bell to me up close, but I had to pasS. I’M BAck home from my strange encounter with a sponge-like bell. Have I possibly gone DAFFY? DUCKing under my table, I spotted another strange thing; a newspaper from a few weeks back. It says PLUTO is not a planet anymore? Rubbish! Under my table, I also found a lolliPOP. EYEing it closely, I found mold on it! Why do I have these things in my house? It is completely DUMB. Of course it is my fault that I don’t throw these things away.

Friday’s Quizzler is….​
I have given you five (5) pairs of words. Fill in the blank below with a single letter to turn these pairs of words into synonyms.

EX: _TUMBLE and _RIP

Answer: STUMBLE and TRIP

1) _COLD and _HIDE

2) _AMBLE and _AGER

3) _EARNING and _RAVING

4) _ALLY and _CORE

5) _AVER and _ALTER

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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