WELCOME to TUESDAY September 26, 2023

Here’s The Story…..
Today marks the 35th anniversary of the death of Sir Douglas Bader and I couldn’t
let it pass without this story about the Royal Air Force hero. He was giving a talk at
an upmarket girl’s school about his time as a pilot in the Second World War. “So there
were two of the fers behind me, three fers to my right, and another fer on the left,” he told the audience. The headmistress went pale and interjected: “Ladies, I would just like to interrupt to point out that the Fokker was a German aircraft.” Sir Douglas replied, “That is true, madam, but these fers were in Messerschmitts.”
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Professional children’s clowns are upset that the Stephen King movie, ‘It,’
makes them look like murderers. That’s true. And professional murderers
are upset that it makes them look like children’s clowns.” -Conan O’Brien

“A New York plastic surgeon has announced that he is creating ‘vacation breasts,’
which are implants that would last two to three weeks. That’s amazing,
isn’t it? Who gets a three-week vacation?” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A husband and wife were sitting at the breakfast table and
the man was reading the ads in the paper.
He looked up and said, “Here is a great sale on new tires!”
His wife replied, “Why do you want to put new tires on that worn out, old wreck you call a car?”
He came back with, “I don’t complain when you go out and buy a new bra, do I?!” 😱😳😳😎

Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I had to live with that squealing, corpulent little toad all these years. God, I hate that woman. I – I – I hate the way she licks stamps! I hate her furniture! And I hate that little sound she makes when she sleeps.”

Answer: Ruthless People!
The scene for this quote takes place as Stone (Devito) tells his lover Anita (Carol Dodsworth) of his plans to kill Barbara (Midler) so that he can have all of the money that they share.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
His eyes are darting warily (but wisely – it seemed like he’d seen it all before, more or less): “That is the sound of a thousand terrible things headed this way!” he announces, mostly prepared to save the day.
She glances up, an expression of world-weary wisdom adorning her face: “You haven’t switched from liquor to dope, by any chance, have you?” she responded, a bit numb in regard to situations in general, but this one (and him) in particular.

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
My work is based on give and take
I can make a difference by a handshake
The older I get the smaller I grow
And my best friend is my worst foe
What am I?

ANSWER: Soap.
(Give and take=give foam and take away dirt,
by a hand shake=as you use me when rubbing your hands,
the older I get the smaller I grow=since I dissolve,
my best friend is my worst foe=water which helps me do my work but at the same time dissolves me.)

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
What do these sentences have in common?

1) Perfect opinions use no deadlines.
2) Doctors originally lose love around royalty.
3) Yellow engines nominate.
4) Friends realise any nonsense comes.
5) Even unusual rags overcome.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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