WELCOME to TUESDAY October 24. 2023
Here’s The Story……
The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink
a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, “Who owns
the big white horse outside?” The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt,
and said, “I do. Why?”
The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, “I just thought you would like
to know that your horse is just about dead outside!!” The Lone Ranger and Tonto
rushed outside and, sure enough, Silver was about dead from heat exhaustion.
The Lone Ranger got him some water and made him drink it, and soon
Silver was starting to feel a little better.
The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, “Tonto, I want you to run around Silver
and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better.”
Tonto said, “Sure Kemosabe”, and took off running circles around Silver. Not able
to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink.
A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and announces,
“Who owns that big white horse outside?” The Lone Ranger stands again and claims,
“I do. What is wrong with him this time?” The cowboy says to him, “Nothing much, I
just wanted you to know………… you left your Injun running!!!” 😳😳😳😎
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
Usher: “Bride or groom?”
Wedding guest: “It should be perfectly obvious I’m neither!”
—Four Weddings and a Funeral
Stan Fields: “Describe your perfect date.”
Cheryl: “That’s a tough one. I’d have to say April 25. Because it’s not
too hot and not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.”
—Stan Fields (William Shatner) and Cheryl Frasier (Heather Burns), Miss Congeniality
“I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered
the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death.
This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral,
you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.”
—Jerry Seinfeld
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre.
When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, “Sorry, sir,
but you’re only allowed one seat.” The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher
became more impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there, I’m going to have to
call the manager. The cowboy just groaned.
The usher marched briskly back up the aisle. In a moment he returned with the manager.
Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no success.
Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked,
“All right buddy, what’s you’re name?”
“Sam,” the cowboy moaned.
“Where ya from, Sam?”
With pain in his voice Sam replied…. “The balcony.” 😳😳😎
Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Ok. Can we order lunch first?”
Answer: Office Space!
A true cult classic, “Office Space” tells the saga of one man and his distaste for his ho-hum life. Peter didn’t know that when he would be hypnotized, his life would never be the same again. With a new found confidence, he and his two friends devise a scheme that would make them rich by stealing from the company they work for. Joanna says this quote to Peter as they were having a lunch date. It was said in response to Peter telling her that he wanted to take her home and watch the television show “Kung Fu.” This began their romance.
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“You start running a respectable business and I won’t have to come in here and hassle you every night.
You know what I mean? And I want the rest of you cowboys to know something, there’s a new sheriff in town.
Monday’s Quizzler is….
Hans Ernest Froopaloop, Jr. will marry one of three women: Audrey, Brenda, and Charlotte. Here are some facts:
- Of Audrey and Brenda:
a. Either they both have blue eyes or neither has blue eyes.
b. One has red hair and the other does not. - Of Audrey and Charlotte:
a. Either they both have red hair or neither has red hair.
b. One is 5’11” and the other is not. - Of Brenda and Charlotte:
a. One has blue eyes and the other does not.
b. One is 5’11” and the other is not. - Of the three characteristics; blue eyes, red hair and 5’11”:
a. If any of the three women has exactly two of the three characteristics, Mr. Froopaloop will marry the one with the least number of characteristics.
b. If any of the three women has exactly one of the three characteristics, Mr. Froopaloop will marry the one with the greatest number of characteristics.
Who will Mr. Froopaloop marry?
ANSWER: Mr. Froopaloop will marry Charlotte.
Facts 1a and 3a tell us that Charlotte is either the only one with blue eyes or the only one without blue eyes. Facts 1b and 2a tell us that Brenda is either the only one with red hair or the only one without red hair. Facts 2b and 3b tell us that Charlotte is either the only one who is 5’11” or the only one who isn’t 5’11”. Fact 4 tells us that no one woman can have one characteristic while another has two characteristics. This gives us two scenarios:
- Audrey has blue eyes, does not have red hair, and is 5’11”. Brenda has blue eyes, red hair, and is 5’11”. Charlotte does not have blue eyes, does not have red hair, and is not 5’11”.
- Audrey does not have blue eyes, has red hair, and is not 5’11”. Brenda does not have blue eyes, does not have red hair, and is not 5’11”. Charlotte has blue eyes, red hair, and is 5’11”.
Fact 4a tells us that in scenario 1, Mr. Froopaloop will marry Charlotte. Fact 4b tells us that in scenario 2, Mr. Froopaloop will marry…Charlotte.
Tuesday’s Quizzler is….
People have gathered from around the world to witness the 2015 snail races. Each snail was handpicked by its country to race its way across the brutal 10cm track. Try to figure out the finishing time, country of origin, and shell color for each of the five snails. Don’t be discouraged if it takes a while to solve, this is a snail race after all.
- Of Todd and the snail with the teal shell, one finished in 24 minutes and the other is from Mexico.
- The snail from Mexico finished 3 minutes after the snail with the lime shell, who finished 1 minute before the snail with the silver shell (who wasn’t Hank).
- The snail from USA finished 2 minutes before Kipp, who finished some time before the snail from Spain.
- Of Ralph and the Spain contestant one had the fastest time and the other had the violet shell.
- The snail from Canada was either the one with the teal shell or the one who finished in 25 minutes.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
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