WELCOME to MONDAY November 27. 2023

WOMEN SEEKING MEN” Classifieds
40-ish means: 48
Adventurer means: Has had more partners than you ever will
Affectionate means: Possessive
Artist means: Unreliable
Average looking means: You figure this one out
Beautiful means: Pathological liar
Commitment-minded means: Pick out curtains, now!
Communication important means: Just try to get a word in edgewise
Contagious Smile means: Bring your penicillin
Educated means: College dropout
Emotionally Secure means: Medicated
Employed means: Has part-time job stuffing envelopes at home
Enjoys art and opera means: Snob
Enjoys Nature means: Bring your own granola
Exotic Beauty means: Would frighten a Martian
Financially Secure means: One paycheck from the street
Free spirit means: Substance abuser
Friendship first means: Trying to live down reputation as slut
Fun means: Annoying
Gentle means: Comatose
Good Listener means: Hard to pull a word from her
Humorous means: Caustic
Intuitive means: Your opinion doesn’t count
In Transition means: Needs new sugar-daddy to pay the bills
Light drinker means: Lush
Looks younger means: If viewed from far away in bad light
Loves Travel means: If you’re paying
Loves Animals means: Cat lady
Non-traditional means: Ex-husband lives in the basement
Open-minded means: Desperate
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie
your shoelaces and wonder what else you could
do while you’re down there.”
—George Burns

“To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!”
—Wanda (Jamie Lee Curtis), A Fish Called Wanda

“Instead of the mahi mahi, may I just get the one
mahi because I’m not that hungry?”
—Shelley Darlingson (Anna Faris), The House Bunny

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Continuing Education Courses for Women
Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before.
The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits.
Parties: Going Without New Outfits.
Man Management: Discover How Minor Household Chores Can Wait Until After the Game.
Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor Is His.
Valuation: Just Because It’s Not Important to You . . .
Communication Skills I: Tears-The Last Resort, Not the First.
Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking.
Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want, Without Nagging.
Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire.
Party Etiquette: Drinking Your Fair Share.
Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up.
Introduction to Parking.
Advanced Parking: Reversing Into A Space.
Overcoming Anal Retentive Behavior: Leaving the Towels on the Floor.
Water retention: Fact or Fat.
Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter.
Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not For Human Consumption.
Cooking III: How Not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People.
Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully.
Dancing: Why Men Don’t Like To.
Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have.
Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice.
Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together.
Ballet: For Women Only.
Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both.
Appreciating the Humor of the Three Stooges.
“Do These Jeans Make Me Look Fat?” – Why Men Lie.
TV Remotes: For Men Only. 😳😳😎

Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“You seem a bit slow; is there someone else I can talk to?”

Answer: “Get Smart” is based on the TV show, which was the about the ongoing battle between CONTROL and KAOS. The movie stars Steve Carell, Anne Hathaway and Alan Arkin. Siegfried says this after he makes a threat to America. He says that he has bombs ready to launch unless his demands are met.
The Chief: “What are your demands?”
Siegfried: “200 billion dollars by 3pm.”
CIA Agent: (to confirm what he thought he heard) “200 billion dollars by 3pm?”
Siegfried: “You seem a bit slow, is there someone else I can talk to?”
The USA writes it off as a bluff so Siegfried proceeds to try to blow up the Walt Disney Concert Hall, which is holding a classical music concert that the President of the USA is attending. CONTROL is able to stop him and the lives of hundreds of people are saved thanks to a sweet tackle by Max Smart.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“The sky is falling!”

Friday’s Quizzler is….​
Take the given words, and by moving a single letter from one word to the other, make a
pair of synonyms, or near synonyms. For example, given: Boast – Hip, move the ‘s’ from
‘Boast’ to ‘Hip’ creating two synonyms: Boat – Ship.

1. Pain – Nil
2. War – Zoned
3. Routing – Tip
4. Shot – Teaming
5. Right – Blight

ANSWER: 1. Pin – Nail

2. Ward – Zone
3. Outing – Trip
4. Hot – Steaming
5. Bright – Light

Monday’s Quizzler is….​
Take the given words, and by moving a single letter from one word to the other, make a pair of synonyms, or near synonyms. For example, given: Boast – Hip, move the ‘s’ from ‘Boast’ to ‘Hip’ creating two synonyms: Boat – Ship.

1. Our – Start
2. Strip – Tumble
3. Clause – Idea
4. Cash – Broom
5. Plight – Lam

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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