WELCOME to THURSDAY November 30. 2023

The top ten reasons why the television is better than the Internet…

10. It doesn’t take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels.
11. When was the last time you tuned in to “Melrose Place” and got a “Error 404” message?
12. There are fewer grating color schemes on TV–even on MTV.
13. The family never argues over which Web site to visit this evening.
14. A remote control has fewer buttons than a keyboard.
15. Even the worst TV shows never excuse themselves with an “Under Construction” sign.
16. Seinfeld never slows down when a lot of people tune in.
17. You just can’t find those cool Health Rider infomercials on the Web.
18. Set-top boxes don’t beep and whine when you hook up to HBO.
19. You can’t surf the Web from a couch with a beer in one hand and Doritos in the other.
    That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY, people, stay safe,
    and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Why do they call it rush
hour when nothing moves?”
—Robin Williams

“I remember it like it was yesterday. Of course,
I don’t really remember yesterday all that well.”
—Dory (Ellen DeGeneres), Finding Dory

“I don’t have to take this abuse from you;
I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.”
—Dr. Peter Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters

Police officer: “Pull over.”
Harry: “No, it’s a cardigan. But thanks for noticing.”
—Harry Dunne (Jeff Daniels), Dumb and Dumber

“I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I
learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.”
—Bob Hope

“If we’re going to pay this much for crab, it better sing
and dance and introduce us to the Little Mermaid.”
—Claire Foster (Tina Fey), Date Night

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Reasons to stay at work all night

1. Act out your version of a company takeover.
2. Find a way to change everyone’s password to “chrysanthemum”.
3. Around 3:20am, play connect-the-dots with lights still on in other office buildings.
   Keep going until you see a small woodland creature.
4. Sneaking in the boss’s desk could land you an unexpected promotion.
5. Draw stick people in all the landscape pictures on the walls, and in the morning, be
   the first to point out “what a terrible thing that someone did this to such beautiful works of art”.
6. Go into the other gender’s bathroom without fear of being caught.
7. Run up and down the hallways screaming, hoping security will come so you can have someone to talk to.
8. Leave prank messages on the CEO’s voice mail.
9. Finally, a chance to live out a dream and pretend to be your boss.
10. Elevator surfing! 😳😳😎

Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“I’ve always wanted a pet that could kill me!”

Answer: “Monsters Inc.” is about a company that scares children for electricity. But when a child is accidentally let into the monsters’ world the monsters’ lives are at stake, until the child can safely be returned to its home. The movie stars John Goodman, Billy Crystal and Steve Buscemi.

The monsters think that children are toxic and can kill monsters but Sulley eventually figures out that children aren’t toxic and then Mike Wazowski, who isn’t convinced that the child isn’t toxic, says “Oh, well in that case let’s keep it, I’ve always wanted a pet that could kill me!

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“That’s not fair! They’ve got rocks, all we’ve got is machine guns!”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
Add together each of the defined words to get a whole new word.
Example: to shout + what you say when you feel pain = a color = yellow.

1) A light brown color + to leave = a dance.
2) A store’s announcement + a type of women’s clothing = a building’s location.
3) A vehicle + an animal pal = a floor covering.
4) The ocean + a father’s boy = part of the year.
5) Another name for dad + a yellow veggie = a white fluffy snack.

ANSWER: 1) tan + go = tango.
2) ad + dress = address.
3) car + pet = carpet.
4) sea + son = season.
5) pop + corn = popcorn.

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
It’s time to get back at the Queen of Hearts by beheading words that start with “Qu”.
In this case, you remove the first TWO letters and still have a valid word.
You will be given clues for the two words, longer word first.
Example: British pound -> Part of the psyche
Answer: The words are Quid and Id.

1. Stop doing -> That thing
2. Peculiar behaviour -> Annoy
3. Subatomic particle -> Large boat
4. Unit of liquid measure -> Product of creativity
5. Small game bird -> To be unwell
6. Large feather; pen -> Unwell; faulty
7. Nausea; uncomfortable -> Simple
8. Misgivings; scruples -> Donations to the poor

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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