WELC0ME to THURSDAY January 11. 2024

Here’s The Story…..
One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated
waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get under way.
The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking
up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the pilot is
using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles
down the aisle. The copilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with sunglasses.
At first, the passengers do not react thinking that it must be some sort of practical
joke. After a few minutes though, the engines start revving, and the
airplane begins moving down the runway.
The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness. They start whispering
among themselves and look desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance.
Yet, the plane starts accelerating rapidly, and people begin panicking. Some passengers
are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the
voices are becoming more and more hysterical.
When the plane has less than twenty feet of runway left, there is a sudden change
in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once. At the very
last moment, the plane lifts off and is airborne.
Up in the cockpit, the copilot breathes a sigh of relief and tells the pilot: “You know,
one of these days the passengers aren’t going to scream,
and we aren’t going to know when to take off!” 😳😳😎
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“People say, ‘But Betty, Facebook is a great way to connect with old friends.’
Well, at my age, if I want to connect with old friends I need a Ouija board.”
—Betty White

“The downside of my celebrity is that I cannot go anywhere in the world
without being recognized. It is not enough for me to wear dark
sunglasses and a wig. The wheelchair gives me away.”
― Stephen Hawking

“I’m not offended by blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb…
and I also know that I’m not blonde.” —Dolly Parton

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
One of Microsoft’s finest technicians was drafted and sent to boot camp.
At the rifle range, he was given some instruction, a rifle, and bullets.
He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target
area that all attempts had completely missed the target.
The technician looked at his rifle, and then at the target. He looked at
the rifle again, and then at the target again. He put his finger over the
end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand.
The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the
target area, “It’s leaving here just fine, the trouble must be at your end!” 😳

Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
‘Eight left and hands, feet on seven stars’

Answer: Buddist Fist!
This quote is used by the fortune teller, as he demonstrates his secret technique to one of Ah Chuns’ masters, because he comes to the aid of Ah Chun. The master then replies back showing his secret technique as well. The fortune teller is sent in to kill Ah Chun, because he is trying to find the whereabouts of his godfather who comes up missing. His godfather is kidnapped because he stumbles on a plot to steal the Jade Buddha, so it can be sold to a foreign item collector.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
‘From what I can tell, your dad’s Kung Fu is useless. I wouldn’t even hire him to wipe my butt’.

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
Emperor Akbar once ruled over India. He was a wise and intelligent ruler, and he had in his court the Nine Gems, his nine advisors, who were each known for a particular skill. One of these Gems was Birbal, known for his wit and wisdom. The story below is one of the examples of his wit. Do you have it in you to find out the answer?

Once Akbar challenged Birbal. He asked Birbal to write a line on the wall which when read in happy times makes you sad but when read in sad times makes you happy.

What would he have written to satisfy the conditions given by his king?

ANSWER: Birbal wrote, “This time will pass soon.”
When read in happy times, you will feel sad that the good times will end.
When read in sad times, you will have hope that the situation will improve, making you happy.
It’s a fact of life that there will be high points and low points. It can help deal with the difficult times knowing that they will pass, and appreciate the good times while you have them, knowing that they won’t last forever. Learn to appreciate what you have, before time makes you appreciate what you had. Abraham Lincoln is known to have included this idea in one of his speeches, “And this, too, shall pass away.”
“When life is good, enjoy it. But when life is hard, remember: God gives good times and hard times, and no one knows what tomorrow will bring.” (Ecclesiastes 7:14)

Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
** or Hyphen-Word Hunt! **

Some English words are usually paired with a hyphen. The rules for this are interesting to browse, and some word pairs can even be correctly written in three different ways – e.g. playgroup, play group, or play-group.

This teaser invites you find a commonly hyphenated word-pair inside a pair of words.
e.g. undisCLOSEd – cUPbearer gives us CLOSE-UP

CLUES

1. Drunken – King
2. Proliferate – Synthesizer
3. Pothole – Dehumidifier
4. Superclean – Prosecutor

… and a triple!

5. Acknowledge – Excited – Footballer
   Meanings or synonyms are provided in the Hint below, but be careful – these might make it too easy.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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