WELC0ME to THURSDAY FEBRUARY 15. 2024
Persiflage: Intelligent Insults
As brutality slowly but surely takes over the US TV and motion picture industries, it is likely
to stamp out any memory of the days of civility when a barbed tongue was as effective as an
artesian gusher of profanity. This page is a remembrance to those days when men and women
sharpened their wits rather than their swords as a defense against friend and enemy. This sort
of light-hearted, chit-chatty mockery is known as persiflage.
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
—Winston Churchill
“A modest little person, with much to be modest about.”
—Winston Churchill
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”
—Clarence Darrow
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.”
—Moses Hadas
“He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.”
—Abraham Lincoln
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”
—Groucho Marx
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
—Mark Twain
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
—Oscar Wilde
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”
—Stephen Bishop
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”
—John Bright
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”
—Irvin S. Cobb
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.”
—Samuel Johnson
“He had delusions of adequacy.”
—Walter Kerr
“There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.”
—Jack E. Leonard
“He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.”
—Robert Redford
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Things are never quite as scary when
you’ve got a best friend.” — Bill Watterson
“Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain.
It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t
learned the meaning of friendship, you really
haven’t learned anything.” — Muhammad Ali
“My best friend is the one who brings
out the best in me.” — Henry Ford
“Friendship is the only cement that will ever
hold the world together.” — Woodrow Wilson
“A day without a friend is like a pot without a single
drop of honey left inside.” — Winnie the Pooh
“Hence (if you will not misunderstand me) the exquisite arbitrariness
and irresponsibility of this love. I have no duty to be anyone’s Friend
and no man in the world has a duty to be mine. No claims, no shadow
of necessity. Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art, like the
universe itself (for God did not need to create). It has no survival value;
rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” — C.S. Lewis
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
New Meanings for Old Words….
Work n. Where mommy and daddy go to get tired.
Agamemnon n. A way to remember the name of a Muslim official.
Inkwell n. An accomplished tattooist.
Lobster n. Someone who throws poorly.
Transcendental adj. Above the teeth.
Apiary n. A sting operation. (Thank you, Eve Moody)
Mobilization n. Removing your land line and switching all calls to your mobile. (Thank you, Dr. Goodword)
Ramification n. A consequence that is forced down your throat. (Thank you, Andy Stein)
Politician n.Someone who shakes your hand befor an election and your confidence after it. (Thank you, Sam Fisher)
Stalemate (stale•mate) n. A leading cause of divorce.
Classic novel np. A book which people praise, but seldom read.
Compromise n. The art of slicing a cake in such a way that everyone believes they received the biggest piece.
Conference n. The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Conference room np. A place where everyone talks, no one listens,
and later everyone disagrees about what was said.
Doctor n. A person who kills your ills with pills then kills you with bills.
Etc. abb. An abbreviation that makes others think you know more than you actually do.
Father n. The banker that nature provides.
Lecture n. The art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to
the notes of the lecturees without passing through the minds of either.
Office n. A place where you can relax after a strenuous night at home.
Smile n. A curve that can set many things straight.
Tears n. The means by which masculine will-power
is defeated by feminine water-power. 😳
Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“You’re a Jedi Knight, aren’t you?”
Answer: “Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace”
Anakin is talking to Qui Gon Jinn when he first meets him at Watto’s shop, in “Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace”, part of the prequel trilogy from George Lucas as part of the “Star Wars” saga. Here we see the origin of Darth Vader as a small boy, who is an excellent pilot with an inquisitive mind. As we have already seen “Episodes IV”, “V” and “VI”, we know what happens later, but not why he turned to the dark side. This begins his story.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Wind in the sails. Wind in the sails.”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
Given the word STANDARD, take away two letters and add three digits to make a logical sequence.
ANSWER: Take away the A’s to leave ST ND RD.
Then add 1, 2, and 3: 1ST 2ND 3RD.
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
It’s rush time at Lotsa Lattes, the popular downtown coffee shop. Jamie, the poor barista, just
had 5 orders told to her over the sound of the coffee grinder. Help her piece together the correct orders to make sure she’ll get tipped.
Each guest ordered a different drink and a different type of muffin.
- Gary was in line before Lisa this morning, but he decided not to order his usual (mocha and a blueberry muffin) and instead tried something new to eat and drink.
- By the time Zack got there, the raspberry muffin had just been ordered by the person ahead of him in line. He ordered an extra dry cappuccino while he decided that morning’s muffin choice.
- The 5 orders were: the mocha, the man who ordered the poppyseed muffin, the 2nd person in line, the tea, and Paul’s order.
- The people who ordered something to drink with chocolate in it (including the mocha) could not possibly eat a chocolate chip muffin, too. No chocolate item was ordered first.
- The men, oddly enough, placed the odd numbered orders.
- The blueberry muffin was ordered before Paul’s order but after the hot chocolate.
- The 3 fruit muffins were sold to Lisa, the first person in line, and to the person who also ordered a mocha.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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