WELC0ME to THURSDAY FEBRUARY 20. 2024
The Tyson one-liners
Q: What did Louis Farrakahn say to Mike Tyson after the fight?
A: No stupid an Eye for an Eye!!!!
Tyson’s psychologist told Mike to take a year off, he obviously
misunderstood….good thing he didn’t say two!
Tyson’s favorite football team-the Tampa Bay Buc-an-EARS.
For the third fight between Mike and Evander, Tyson wants it to be held in Earie, PA.
New Tyson burger: There is a piece of the champ in every bite!!!
They are making a new boxing term for Tyson….instead of KO, it will
be a Van Gogh. “Evander was Van Gogh’d in the third!!!”
Can’t beat um…Eat um!!!!
If Tyson fights Golatta,is it more points for a low blow or an ear bite?
In this corner Evander “the Real Meal” Holyfield!!!!!!!
Before the fight, Mike’s trainer told him to get a piece of Holyfied. Oops, bad advice.
Iron BITE Tyson, the heavyweight CHOMP of the world!
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods
and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path.”
—Ellen DeGeneres
“Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night
calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’”
—Anonymous
“Breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. You can’t do it in
one push; you got to rock it back and forth a few times, and then it goes over.”
—Jerry (Jerry Seinfeld), Seinfeld
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A true story, according to the LA Times…..
Coach Frank Layden of the Utah Jazz asked forward Jeff Wilkins,
“Is your bad play due to ignorance or apathy?”
Wilkins replied, “I don’t know and I don’t care!” 😳😳
Wednesday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Can we try with real bullets now?”
Answer: Léon (The Professional)!
Mathilda played by Natalie Portman is a 12 year old girl who witnessed her family being killed. She links up with Léon played by Jean Reno who is a gun for hire or “cleaner”. Léon teaches her how to prepare guns and shoot, they practice sniping from the rooftop with an empty gun. The odd couple manage to outwit the bad guy played by Gary Oldman.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Grasshopper? Look here, you – you impudent young pup! It wouldn’t hurt you to take orders
from your grasshop – er, your conscience, if you have one!”
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
One snowy night, Sherlock Holmes was in his house sitting by a fire. All of a sudden a snowball came crashing through his window, breaking it.
Holmes got up and looked out the window just in time to see three neighborhood kids who were brothers run around a corner. Their names were John Crimson, Mark Crimson and Paul Crimson.
The next day Holmes got a note on his door that read “? Crimson. He broke your window.”
Which of the three Crimson brothers should Sherlock Holmes question about the incident?
ANSWER: Mark Crimson
“?” = question MARK, so the note on the door reads “Question Mark Crimson. He broke your window.”
Thursday’s Quizzler is….
Some anagrams are almost too good to be true. The letters in the capitalised words or phrases can be
rearranged in delightful ways to fill the gaps!
e.g. Is my lovely _ really a WOMAN HITLER?
Answer: mother-in-law
- The _ Church can be BEST IN PRAYER.
- The school bully gave his victim NINE THUMPS as a _.
- Someone with BAD CREDIT can still manage to pay with a _.
- If you missed it last time, keep waiting, for _ SHALL YET COME!
- Perhaps because _ could be a NICE SILKY WOMAN, a president fell for her!
Warning! The hint will give you the starting letters of all words. It will make the teaser quite easy, so only check if really necessary!
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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