WELC0ME to MONDAY MARCH 25. 2024
Signs You’ve Grown Up……
- Your house plants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.
- 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
- You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
- 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
- You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
- You watch the Weather Channel.
- Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.
- You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
- Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
- You’re the one calling the police because those darn
kids next door won’t turn down the stereo. 😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few
drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.”
–Mahatma Gandhi
“I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell-you
see, I have friends in both places.”
–Mark Twain
“I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look
down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.”
–Sir Winston Churchill
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
New Jersey’s Crazy Laws
It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
You may not slurp your soup.
If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated,
you may never again apply for personalized license plates.
It is against the law to “frown” at a police officer.
On a highway you can not park under a bridge.
Car dealerships are forbidden from opening on Sunday.
You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service and full service only.
Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.
It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon. 😳😳
Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“That’s criminal! That kid, that kid is back on the escalator again!”
Answer: Mallrats!
“Mallrats” is a 1995 movie directed and written by Kevin Smith, in which he also appears as Silent Bob. The second movie in Smith’s “View Askewniverse” after “Clerks”, it is a prequel to that movie. Jeremy London plays T.S., whose insensitivity causes a break with his girlfriend Brandie (Claire Forlani). He hangs around the mall with his friend, Brodie (Jason Lee), and they have some scrapes and strange encounters. Brodie takes exception to a young child on the escalator, which is where the outraged quote in the question comes from. T.S. and Brandi eventually marry. Also starring are Ben Affleck and Shannon Doherty, with a cameo from Stan Lee.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.”
Friday’s Quizzler is….
D
N
A
T
S , D
ANSWER: Stand up comedy (stand up comma D)
Monday’s Quizzler is….
What do these sentences translate to?
“A research team proceeded towards the apex of a natural geologic protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitously descended, sustaining severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomical structure; subsequently the second member of the team performed a self rotational translation oriented in the same direction taken by the first team member.”
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
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The World According to the Eucman! 