WELC0ME to MONDAY JULY 1, 2024
Here’s The Story….
The district attorney was cross-examining the murderess on
the witness stand.
“And so after you had poisoned the coffee and your husband
sat at the breakfast table partaking of the fatal dosage,
didn’t you feel any qualms? Didn’t you feel the slightest
pity for him knowing that he was about to die and was wholly
unconscious of it?”
“Yes,” she answered. “Come to thik of it…there was just a
moment when I sort of felt sorry for him.”
“And, when was that?”
“When he asked for the second cup.”
😳😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
I think all these storms are God’s way of sending us a
message. I think that message is that when warm humid air
masses surge northward from the Gulf of Mexico and combine
with a strong jet stream, it can result in severe weather
conditions.” -Jimmy Kimmel
“They say the sunsets in the South Pacific are a shade of
orange that you can’t see anywhere else on earth. It would
be like seeing Snooki up close.” -Craig Ferguson
“A new study found that students who use Facebook while
studying have 20 percent lower grades than students who
focus. When kids who use Facebook heard that they were
like, ’20 percent? Big deal. What’s that, like 10 percent?'”
-Jimmy Fallon
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Since he runs a pawnshop, I decided to ask a friend of mine
to appraise my grandfather’s violin. “Old fiddles aren’t
worth much, I’m afraid,” he explained.
“What makes it a fiddle and not a violin?” I asked.
“If you’re buying it from me, it’s a violin. If I’m buying
it from you, it’s a fiddle.” 😳😳
Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
A medical student gets in trouble when he tries to treat patients with humor and understanding, rather than cold logic.
Answer: Patch Adams!
Robin Williams stars as first-year medical student Hunter “Patch” Adams, who clashes with the staff of his medical college when he suggests a different approach to medicine. Adam’s methods get him expelled, but he is later reinstated. He goes on to found a clinic using humor as a tool in treatment.
Monday’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this???
A journalist is assigned to cover a motorcycle race in Las Vegas, which he and his attorney friend turn into a drug-fueled weekend of excess.
Friday’s Quizzler is….
A duke was hunting in the forest with his men-at-arms and servants when he came across a tree. Upon it, archery targets were painted and smack in the middle of each was an arrow. “Who is this incredibly fine archer?” cried the duke. “I must find him!”
After continuing through the forest for a few miles he came across a small boy carrying a bow and arrow. Eventually the boy admitted that it was he who shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets. “You didn’t just walk up to the targets and hammer the arrows into the middle, did you?” asked the duke worriedly. “No my lord. I shot them from a hundred paces. I swear it by all that I hold
holy.” “That is truly astonishing,” said the duke. “I hereby admit you into my service.”
The boy thanked him profusely. “But I must ask one favor in return,” the duke continued. “You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding shot.”
How’d he get to be such a good shot?
ANSWER: The boy shot the arrow, THEN painted the circle around it.
Monday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
A part of the body is hidden in each of the following sentences.
The first sentence contains “head.” Can you find the rest?
- The ad is for Monday’s sale.
- The tour group can go to either country.
- My car makes funny noises sometimes.
- Sarah and Tony are getting married.
- That casino seems shady.
- Can’t you see that Hank needs help?
- The sea is so calm out here.
- Would you like to go surfing, Erin?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. 😳😳
The World According to the Eucman! 