WELCOME to WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 1st, 2025

Here’s The Story….
A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates.
Ahead of him is a guy who’s dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, a leather jacket, and jeans.
Saint Peter addresses this guy,
“Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?”
The guy replies, “I’m Joe Cohen, taxi driver, of Noo Yawk City.”
St. Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi driver,
“Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven.”
The taxi driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff, and it’s the minister’s turn.
He stands erect and booms out,
“I am Joseph Snow, pastor of Calvary for the last forty-three years.”
St Peter consults his list. He says to the minister,
“Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven.”
“Just a minute,” says the minister.
“That man was a taxi driver, and he gets a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be?!”
“Up here, we work by results,” says Saint Peter.
“While you preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed.”
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

 
“Last week, Twitter introduced a ‘quality filter’ that gets rid of tweets that contain 
spam, mean, or unwanted content. An hour later, Twitter filed for bankruptcy.” -Conan O’Brien

“Police in Australia are searching for a group of men seen releasing live crocodiles into 
a school building. Though, if you ask me, they should probably be searching 
for the crocodiles.” -Seth Meyers

“A new study found that people with a lot of phobias are more likely to have health
problems. Or as those people put it, ‘I was afraid of that.'” -Jimmy Fallon 
 

 
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The proud father brought home a backyard swing set for his children and immediately 
started to assemble it with all the neighborhood children anxiously waiting to play on it.

After several hours of reading the directions, attempting to fit bolt A into slot B, etc., he 
finally gave up and called upon an old handyman working in a neighboring yard.

The old-timer came over, threw the directions away, and in a short while 
had the set completely assembled.

It’s beyond me,” said the father, “how you got it together without 
even reading instructions.”

“To tell the truth,” replied the old-timer, “I can’t read, and 
when you can’t read, you’ve got to think.” 😮😮 
 

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  
This movie is about two elf brothers questing for an artifact.
   
ANSWER: Onward!

Wednesdays Movie Trivia of the day!  
This movie’s basic premise is that an Earth-bound asteroid causes Earth’s cold-blooded animals to mutate 
into monsters with catastrophic effects on humanity.

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
The Devil, on a soul quest, came across an elder Monk with a reputation for soul saving. But this man of the cloth also had a stronger local reputation for fine wines and a game of chance now and then. The Monk’s soul saving in this province was of note down below and the Devil himself was here to deal with this monk.

The Devil found the Monk at work on a roasted leg of mutton and nearly empty bottle of extremely fine brandy after vespers. Introductions were made when the Devil produced an even finer, dusty bottle of Cognac. The two talked and argued past the curfew bell, night prayer and even past the toiling for morning prayers. The Monk noticed early on that this bottle of especially fine brandy never emptied. Cup after cup of this heavenly smooth spirit flowed from this one bottle. Knowing of devil trickery was one thing, but there was no denying the rich spirited taste of this fine ambrosia. “If only the rivers in Heaven flowed so smoothly”, thought the Monk.

And for his part, giving the Devil his due, the Devil knew he now could tempt the Monk.

“A simple wager, Monk; find a task that I cannot do that any of your poor, humble mass of morality can perform and this very bottle is yours.”

“And if you can then…”

“Yes old man, your soul is mine.”

The Monk thought deeply, then drank one last time from this never emptying bottle, for courage, rose and took the Devil’s hand in a solemn pledge and agreed.

A bit surprised but delighted, the Devil had to boast, “I am stronger, faster, and smarter than any mortal. I can go anywhere and return in the blink of an eye. I have seen all and know everything. There are no secrets that I don’t know, no places or things that I cannot find. There is nothing that I can’t do, or nothing I can’t be, that your common mortals can. Your wager is lost, and I’ll gladly take it old Monk. But know this; my death and salvation long ago were decided.”

“Fear not, Devil, Heaven nor I wish your soul; nor wish you to simply return from which you came. That would be too simple. Now, if I heard you correctly, you can go any place?”

“Any place, Monk; even to end of the universe and return. There is nothing I can’t do!”

However, the Monk did give the Devil a task that he could not do; a task that mortals often perform. What was the task?

ANSWER: The Monk told the Devil to ‘get lost’. And, in case you’re wondering, it was said that, many years later, 
the bottle was laid to rest with the Monk.  
 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​😎😎
The wind eased itself gently through Captain Sheba’s hair as he pressed his eye against his spy glass. “Land! At last we are rich!” he shouted to his crew members. They anchored not very far away from the strange little island, rowed toward the shore and arrived safely. “Brethren, we’ve found the island. From the information we have so far, the treasure is hidden under one of these colored rocks on the shore and the rest of the rocks have a poisonous gas trapped beneath them. Alas, I can’t afford to lose any of my crew members. If we could only decode the last part of these writings, we would know which rock the treasure is under. I will give ten percent of the find to anyone who is able to decode this last message!”

At the end of your power
At the beginning of eternity
Blessed is he who finds me
He who still exists after uncovering me
To enjoy my riches forever
My last is in mud somewhere wherever
That’s all the writings say. There are four rocks. They are blue, red, white, and black respectively. 
Which one has the treasure hidden under it?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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