WELCOME to THURSDAY MARCH 19th, 2026

Here’s The Story…..
A native American walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand and is pulling a
male buffalo with the other hand and says to the waiter, “Want coffee.”
The waiter says, “Sure chief, coming right up.” He gets the native American a tall
mug of coffee. After drinking the coffee down in one gulp, the native American
turns and shoots the buffalo with the shotgun, then just walks out.
The next morning the native American returns. He has his shotgun in one hand
and is pulling another male buffalo with the other hand.
He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, “Want coffee.”
The waiter says, “Whoa, Tonto! We’re still cleaning up your mess from yesterday.
What the heck was all that about, anyway?”
The native American smiles and proudly says, “Training for upper management position.
Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up,
disappear for rest of day.” [One punny word, but still true!]
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL THURSDAY` people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

Puns for All Occasions…..
A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
All the toilets in London police stations have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went; then it dawned on me.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
I didn’t like my beard at first, but it grew on me.
I dropped out of socialism class because of lousy Marx.
I took the job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
This dyslexic man walks into a bra.
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
Why is 10 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
When chemists die, they barium.
Velcro! What a rip off!

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Why can a man never starve in the Great Desert? Because he can eat the sand
which is there. But what brought the sandwiches there? Why,
Noah sent Ham and his descendants mustered and bred.
 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  
 This 1993 thriller centers on a man wrongly accused of killing his wife. Which film stars Harrison Ford as
a doctor who escapes from custody to track down the real one-armed culprit?

Answer:   The correct answer was The Fugitive! 1993’s ‘The Fugitive’ stars Harrison Ford as Dr. Richard Kimble, a Chicago surgeon whose life gets considerably messier after he is convicted of killing his wife, a crime he insists he did not commit. The real killer? A one-armed man, of course! 
Then… a spectacularly bad day involving a prison bus, a train, and the less desirable effects of gravity allows him to escape, which is quite fortunate because it wouldn’t be a very exciting movie otherwise. However, he does escape, allowing him to become The Fugitive. Instead of packing his bags for Mexico like a sensible escaped felon, Kimble decides to clear his name himself. This involves a lot of sneaking around in hospitals as well as that old Hollywood trope of following pharmaceutical paper trails. Meanwhile, he’s being chased by a man on a mission: Deputy U.S. Marshal Samuel Gerard. He’s played remarkably well by Tommy Lee Jones, who got the Oscar for his performance.

 
Thurdays Movie Trivia of the day!  
Released in 1995, what family movie follows a talking pig who defies the hefty odds to become a champion sheep-herder?

Monday’s Quizzler is….​
There is a reason why men’s clothes have buttons on the right
while women have buttons on the left. What is it?

Answer: Most people are right handed and find it easier to fasten a button which is on the right through a hole which is on the left. This is why men’s buttons are on the right. When buttons were first used it was rich people who could afford clothes with buttons. Among this class the ladies were often dressed by maid servants. The servant would face the lady and so it was easier for right handed servants to fasten buttons which were on the lady’s left. 

Thurday’s Quizzler is….​😎😎
Assuming you can’t steal an animal’s sense of hearing, or use an electrical device,
what would you need in order to hear a pin drop from over 20 yards?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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