Welcome, to Monday, March 8th! Today we take a look at some new defintions! 
1. Atom Bomb : An invention to end all inventions.

2. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

3. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.

4. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

5. Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

6. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

7. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

8. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

9. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest….except that he got caught.

10. Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.

11. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

12. Divorce : Future tense of marriage.

13. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

14. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

15. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

16. Father: A banker provided by nature.

Number 16 people, that would be my role in life! Hey I’m just saying. Have a great Monday, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!   
   
Quotes of the Day  

Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults in the first. 

There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. 
   
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
 
Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived.

When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic.

Joke of the Day*

The junior officers challenged the senior officers at an Air Force Base in North Caroline to see who would donate the most blood. After trying several times to locate a vein in the left arm of a young first lieutenant, the medical technician applied a Band-Aid, and then inserted a needle into the right arm, drawing blood this time, and then put a Band-Aid on that arm as well.  As he left the collection facility, the lieutenant passed a colonel.
Noting the two bandages, he looked at the first lieutenant and shook his head, saying, “I knew you young guys would find some way to cheat.”  

_________________________________________________________________________
 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘Melted chocolate in the dash, that really ups the resale value.’ ‘I think we’re gonna be ok here. They’re covered in a thin candy shell.’ ‘Your brain has a thick candy shell.’ ‘Your brain’s the one with the shell on it…’ ‘Are you talking?’ ‘Shut up, Richard!’   Answer: Tommyboy.   

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from????  “Because you told me the first time that I met you that you didn’t gobble and you didn’t lie. Well I don’t [care] if you gobble but don’t you ever lie to me again. Because I’ll forgive you once, but I won’t forgive you twice.” 

_________________________________________________________________________ 

Friday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006, try and identify which song or which artist.”  “What hurts the most Was being so close And having so much to say And watching you walk away And never knowing What could have been; And not seeing that loving you Is what I was tryin’ to do…” 

ANSWER: The hit song “What Hurts The Most” was first recorded by Mark Wills. Later however, Rascal Flatts recorded the song on the album “Me And My Gang.” Flatt’s cover was arguably the better of the two versions and reached very high rankings on the charts.  

Monday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2006 try and identify which song or which artist.” “So delicious (It’s hot, hot) So delicious (I put them boys on rock, rock) So delicious (they wanna slice of what I got)”
_________________________________________________________________________ 

Friday’s Quizzler is..  

Find the names of five pieces of jewelry by adding one of the given letters to each word and rearranging the letters. Each letter used will be used only once. There are extra letters in the list to make it a little harder.

A B C I K M N P S U

1. Arch + ? =
2. Chore + ? =
3. Bagel + ? =
4. Come + ? =
5. Thaw + ? =    

ANSWER: 1. Charm, 2. Choker, 3. Bangle, 4. Cameo, 5. Watch   

Monday’s Quizzler is…

Can you decipher this phrase:

1) Rib
2) Rib <—
3) Rib <—
4) Rib
5) Rib <—
6) Rib
7) Rib <— 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5, WAY2GOJAZZ! 

=========================================================
Answers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT:  www.slampi.org.  ww.hopeBUILD.org. www.Eucmaninc.com. www.wcscatering.com., www.Beaumont77.com. www.BTWASHZPROD.com.   www.newnorthsideconferencecenter.net.  www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com., www.schoons.com., www.awj-law.com.