Welcome, ‏to Tuesday September 7, 2010.  Here’s an old joke thats been flying around the internet, but its still one of my favs! 
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71 years old. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker and the Hostess Twinkies. The graveside was piled high with flours, as long time friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as the man who “never knew how much he was kneaded.” Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting most of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions.  Fresh is survived by his second wife — they have two children and one in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.  Hey I’m just saying! Have a amazing Tuesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here!   
  

Q U O T E S  O F  T H E  D A Y ! 

“A recent study has found that more senior citizens than
ever are entering college. College faculty says that the
seniors are like any other students…except they take
Jell-O shots just for the Jell-O.” –Conan O’Brien 
 
“Firefighters are working around the clock to control fires
here in California. I hate to say it, but this is what we
get for making forests out of wood.” -Jimmy Kimmel
 
“In New York, the Health Department has starting putting up
anti-soda posters throughout the city, showing ‘pure liquid
fat’ being poured into a glass. People have been really
affected by the ads, they’re going into stores and saying,
‘Hey do you have that new all-fat soda? That stuff looks
great.'” -Jimmy Fallon  

“New York is facing an infestation of bed bugs. Bed bugs
can live up to a year without feeding. They’re like super-
models.” -Craig Ferguson
 
“A new study found that heavy drinkers outlive non-drinkers,
but the ways they die are a lot more embarrassing.”
-Jimmy Fallon
 
“Congress is very upset with Roger Clemens because they feel
like they were lied to. Good! Now they know how we feel.”
-Jay Leno 

G u a r a n t e e d  t o  R o l l  Y o u r  E y e s  

At a posh Manhattan dinner party, a Latin American visitor was telling the guests about this home country and himself. As he concluded, he said, “And I have a charming and
understanding wife but, alas, no children.” As his listeners appeared to be waiting for him to continue, he said, haltingly, “You see, my wife is unbearable.” 
Puzzled glances prompted him to try to clarify the matter: “What I mean is, my wife is inconceivable.” As his companions seemed amused, he floundered deeper into
the intricacies of the English language, explaining triumphantly, “That is, my wife, she is impregnable!”   

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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from????  “I’m sorry I called your wife a fat bloated warthog.”

Answer:  Highlander! Connor McLeod (Christopher Lambert) mutters this when he is in duel in Boston Commons, and is tired of getting stabbed repeatedly. This is one of the many flashback scenes in “Highlander” (1986). “Highlander” is the classic story of the immortal Connor McLeod and it goes from the Highlands of Scotland in 1538, when Connor is a young man and is first killed in battle, all the way up to 1986 New York where he is still alive and playing The Game. Immortals fight for the prize, and the last one standing gets all the powers of all the other immortals. Whoever wins gets to decide the fate of the world. 

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “Must go faster. Must go faster. Go go go.” 

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Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005, try and identify which song or which artist.”  “My favorite rapper used to sing ch-check out my melody”.  

ANSWER: 50 Cent! The song is called “Hate It Or Love It” off of The Game’s debut album “The Documentary” (2005). The Game and 50 Cent are also featured together in the song “This Is How We Do” which is also off of the Game’s debut album.  

Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005 try and identify which song or which artist.”   “Sometimes You Can’t Make it On Your Own”.

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Monday’s Quizzler is..   

Diagramless is a special form of crossword puzzle. It is the same, just you have no idea where the black squares are, you have to use the answers to the clues and the numbers of them to figure that out.  Can you figure this diagramless out?  It is just a small, 4×4 grid, and there are two black squares.

Across Clues: 1. Water Sport, 5. Best Grade, 6. __ top of; above, 7. Place of relaxation, 9. Water Level

Down Clues: 1. Opposite of future, 2. Oxygen, 3. Fill by putting on, 4. Opposite of off, 8. 3.14, 10. Vowel between C and H  

ANSWER: Here are the answers to the rows.

Row 1 – POLO, Row 2 – A-ON, Row 3 – SPA-, Row 4 – TIDE

Here are the answers to the columns:

Column 1 – PAST, Column 2 – O-PI, Column 3 – LOAD, Column 4 – ON-E    

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…   

You are to create a series of 6 FOUR-LETTERED words that link with each other. Based on the clues below, your task is to ensure that the last letter of a word becomes the first letter of the next word. Good luck.

I have given you an example below of how the teaser should be attempted.

EXAMPLE
Clues:
1. Emptiness, 2. Stupor, 3. Desire, 4. Tug…

Answer:
Void – Daze – Envy – Yank…

CLUES:

1. Uncommon, 2. Greek god, 3. Heavenly body, 4. A lodging or chamber, 5. An insect of the order Lepidoptera, 6. A crew member of a ship.  

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS!  AMAZING JOB BANKS!        

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Answers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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