Monday’s Daily Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏

WELCOME to Monday, November 29, 2010. Just for Today………….

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes what Abraham Lincoln said is true: “Most folks are about as happy as they make their mind up to be.” Happiness comes from within; it is not a matter of externals.

Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is; not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come and fit myself to them.

Just for today I will take care of my body. I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse or neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do someone a good turn and not get found out. I will do at least two chores I don’t want to do, as William James suggests, just for exercise.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, speak diplomatically, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticize not at all, nor find fault with anything, and not try to regulate or improve anyone.

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do things for twelve hours that would appall me if I had to keep them up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will have a program. I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests: hurrying and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour by myself and relax and get a little more perspective into my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. Particularly, I will be unafraid to be happy; to enjoy what is beautiful; to love; and to believe that those I love, love me.

“If you are still talking about what you did yesterday, you haven’t done much today.” Hey I’m just saying! Have a great day and no matter what you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace I am outta here!

Quotes of the day

“I think vests are all about protection. The life vest protects you from drowning, and the bullet-proof vest protects you from getting shot and the sweater vest protects you from girls.” -Demetri Martin

“I went to the doctor and all he did was suck blood from my neck. Do NOT go see Dr. Acula!” -Mitch Hedberg

“Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, un-married with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work or prison.” -Tim Allen

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes.

I’m the postmaster for a small town in Pennsylvania. One of my regular customers, Jeff, bought several sheets of newly released commemorative stamps. Soon after he left, a woman came in carrying two crisp sheets of Harry Houdini stamps she’d found in the parking lot. The next morning, I gave Jeff the sheets of stamps he’d lost. “You know,” Jeff said to me, “I’m not at all that surprised the Houdini stamps reappeared.”
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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘My wife used to say I was a hard man to know.’
Answer: The Shawshank Redemption! Andy Dufresne (Tim Robbins) shares some personal information with Red (Morgan Freeman) late in the film.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘I didn’t call you a retard; I called you a mongoloid. And I took it back.’
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Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007, try and identify which song or which artist.” “You don’t have to find your own way out, you’ve got a voice let it be heard”?

Answer: “Everybody “- Keith Urban! This song is from Keith’s fourth solo album to be released in the US.

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007 try and identify which song or which artist.” “I’ve given you my best why does she get the best of you?”?

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Friday’s Quizzler is..

Below are words or phrases grouped in pairs. There is a different word that fits in the middle of each set that can be defined by both sides. Your task is to find those words.

Example:
Flower ________ Stood
Answer: Rose

1. Enclosure for animals – __________ – Writing instrument
2. Male sheep – __________ – Collide into something
3. To shove one thing inside another – __________ – A collection of miscellaneous items
4. Not specific or definite – __________ – Military officer of very high rank

ANSWER: 1. Enclosure for animals – Pen – Writing instrument
2. Male sheep – Ram – Collide into something
3. To shove one thing inside another – Stuff – A collection of miscellaneous items
4. Not specific or definite – General – Military officer of very high rank

Monday’s Quizzler is…

What is the next word in this series? Choose from the pool.

deal, ether, pant, wrath, realty, ?

Pool: archery, canteen, leopard, pollute, snapper, tractor

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS AND SWEETJAZZ5! BRILLIANT JOB LADIES!

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Answers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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