WELCOME to Friday, December 3, 2010. The incredibly dumb……..

AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership”. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.

Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them, shouting please to come out and give himself up.

An Illinois man pretending to have a gun kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines. The kidnapper then proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

A 9-year-old boy in Manassas, Virginia received a one-day suspension under his elementary school’s drug policy last week – for Certs! Joey Hoeffer allegedly told a classmate that the mints would make him “jump higher.”

A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for three days for giving a classmate a cough drop. School principal Forest Mann reiterated the school’s “zero-tolerance” policy…not to be confused with the “zero-intelligence” policy.

Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month – a short in the homeowner’s newly installed fire prevention alarm system. “This is even worse than last year,” said the distraught homeowner, “when someone broke in and stole my new security system…”

Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Friday and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here!

q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

“The annual ‘Christmas Village’ in Philadelphia has been renamed the ‘Holiday Village.’ In fact, they’re not Santa’s reindeer anymore…they’re now ‘nondenominational venison.'”
-Jay Leno

“Turns out that it’s not the turkey that makes you sleepy — it’s being drunk at 4:00 p.m. on Thursday.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“President Obama has set aside over 180 million acres of land for polar bears. When Sarah Palin heard about it, she said, ‘Todd, get my gun!'” -Conan O’Brien

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes.
The phone rang. It was a salesman from a mortgage refinance company. “Do you have a second mortgage on your home?” “No,” I replied. “Would you like to consolidate all your debts?” “I really don’t have any,” I said. “How about freeing up cash for home improvements?” he tried. “I don’t need any. I just recently had some done and paid cash,” I parried. There was a brief silence, and then he asked, “Are you looking for a husband?”
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Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? ‘Don’t think you’ve bought yourself any time by bringing me here…because you need to remember: I *am* a stranger to you. You have no idea what I’m capable of.’

Answer:The Negotiator! Chicago Police Department negotiator Chris Sabian (Kevin Spacey) makes it clear to fellow negotiator Danny Roman (Samuel L. Jackson) that the hostage situation Danny has brought about remains extremely dangerous for all involved.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘I’m black, and I’m proud.’
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Thursday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007, try and identify which song or which artist.” “The rain is falling on my window pane but we are hiding in a safer place under covers staying safe and warm you give me feelings that I adore”?

Answer: “Bubbly” – Colbie Caillat

This song is ridiculously popular. Colbie was born May 28, 1985.

Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007 try and identify which song or which artist.” “I loved you with a fire red, now it’s turnin’ blue and you say sorry, you’re not the angel Heaven let me think was you”

TODAY’S CRAZY SONG DIVIA AWARD GOES TO MS. CARRIE PALOMBO FOR SOLVING TODAY’S SONG DEFINITION! GREAT JOB CARRIE!

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Thursday’s Quizzler is..

Below are 3 pairs of words. Find the words that fit in the middle of each pair of words to create two new words, one front-ended and one back-ended.

Example: EVER – ______ – HORN
Answer: EVER – GREEN – HORN

HOG – ___________ – CLOTH
DETER – __________ – FIELD
WASTE – ___________ – BALL

ANSWER: HOG – WASH – CLOTH
DETER – MINE – FIELD
WASTE – BASKET – BALL

Friday’s Quizzler is…  

Can you decipher the following common phrase?

L8AAAAPORVERYTANTD8

TODAYS QUIZZMASTERS OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5 AND MS. ANDREA L. BANKS FOR SOLVING THURSDAY’S QUIZZLER OF THE DAY! BRILLIANT JOB LADIES!
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Answers in MONDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/