WELCOME to Tuesday, January 11, 2010. Ponderings for Today ….

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, does it make a sound?

A single fact can spoil a good argument.

Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.

I do whatever my Rice Krispies tell me to.

Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game” when we’re already there?

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

If you yelled at your plants instead of talking to them, would they still grow? Only to be troubled and insecure?

Is there another word for synonym?

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Tuesday and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y!

“A new study found that humans started wearing clothes about 170,000 years ago. In fact, the first sentence ever spoken
was, ‘Me look fat in this?'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Happy birthday to Elvis Presley. Elvis changed the face of movies and music. He made 35 movies, and in every one, he played a singing race-car driver.” -David Letterman

“A professor at Utah State University is now studying people who suffer from what he calls a compulsive obsession with morality and religion. They had these people when I was a
kid. They were called parents.” -Jay Leno

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s

There was a farmer who had many pigs. One day someone came to the farm and asked the farmer, “What do you use to feed your pigs?” “Well, I give them acorn, corn, and things like that. Why?”
“Because I am from the Animals Protection Association and I think you don’t feed them like you should, they shouldn’t eat wastes.” Then he fined the farmer. Some days later, another person arrived and asked the same question. The farmer answered, “Well, I feed them very well. I give them fish, whole grains, hot corn mash and as much fresh fruit and vegetables as I can get my hands on. Why?”
“Because I am from the United Nations Organization and I think it’s unfair that you feed your pigs like that when there are people dying with nothing to eat.” And he fined the farmer. Finally, another man came in and asked the same question. The hesitant farmer answered after a minute of careful thought: “Well, I give five dollars to each pig so they can buy whatever it is they want.”
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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? ‘Do you know how stupid he is? He thinks that the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.’

Answer: A Fish Called Wanda! Wanda (Jamie Lee Curtis) is describing Otto (Kevin Kline), who *hates* being called stupid.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘Did he dazzle you with his extensive knowledge of mineral water? Or was it his in-depth analysis of, uh, uh, Marky Mark that finally reeled you in?’
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Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2008, try and identify which song or which artist.” “I used to rule the world, Seas would rise when I gave the word, Now in the morning I sleep alone, Sweep the streets I used to own, I used to roll the dice, Feel the fear in my enemies eyes, Listen as the crowd would sing: Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! 

Answer: “Viva La Vida” – Coldplay! All four members of Cold Play wrote this song for their fourth album. The lyrics to the song contain historical and religious references. The song debuted on May 7, 2008. The name of the song translated into English means “Live the Life”.

Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2008 try and identify which song or which artist. “Well you done done me and you bet I felt it I tried to be chill but you’re so hot that I melted I fell right through the cracks And now I’m trying to get back Before the cool done run out I’ll be giving it my best est Nothing’s going to stop me but divine intervention I reckon it’s again my turn to win some or learn some”

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Monday’s Quizzler is..

Can you find the one word for each list that can be added to the end of each word in its list to create a new word, compound word, or phrase?

round, show , throw, grow
out, be, in, sub
put, shake , get, hoe

ANSWER: up

side

down

upside-down!

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…

A different fruit (a total of twelve) is buried in every one of the following lines.

Example: A word is considered ‘buried’ when it can be read like P A R I S in the sentence “Grand-pa(pa ris)es at seven every morning.”
Can you detect them?

Ah! If I get my good ship home
I’ll find a tempting spot,
Where mayhap pleasant flowers will bloom,
And there I’ll shape a charming cot.

Where bees sip nectar in each flower,
And Philomel on hawthorn rests,
I’ll shape a rustic, sun-kissed bower –
A bower meet for angel guests.

Then she who lives and loves with me,
Sing our days of calm repose,
Sole monarch of the flowers will be –
For Myra is indeed a rose. 

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Answers in WEDNESDAY Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/