WELCOME to Wednesday, January 12, 2010. 10 Reasons Why You Should Ask
Your Boss For A Raise….

10. You take your paycheck to the bank and the teller bursts out in hysterical laughter.

9. The Red Cross calls and offers you emergency assistance.

8. Your only charge cards are for the Salvation Army, ARC, and DAV thrift stores.

7. You work full time and you still qualify for food stamps.

6. You empty out your piggy bank and then cook the bank and serve it for your Easter ham.

5. All you can think about morning, noon and night is clipping grocery coupons.

4. You file your income taxes and the IRS returns them stamped, “Charity Case — Return To Sender.”

3. You set the world record for mailing $1.00 rebate requests to Young America, Minnesota.

2. You pay all your bills, put your remaining $1 bill into your billfold and it goes into shock.

1. You get arrested for taking the coins out of the fountain in the mall.

Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Wednesday and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here!

q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

“A new study found that humans started wearing clothes
about 170,000 years ago. In fact, the first sentence ever
spoken was, ‘Me look fat in this?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Always do right. This will gratify some people and
astonish the rest.”
– Mark Twain

“The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months
in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would
never hear the evidence.”
– H. L. Mencken

“A teenager in the northwest survived 10 hours on a mountain using tips from the Discovery Channel show ‘Man vs. Wild.’ And also, because it was only 10 hours.” -Jimmy Fallon

“Lawmakers are getting tough on bullying. New Jersey Gov.
Chris Christie signed some of the toughest anti-bullying
laws in the nation. Then someone gave Christie a wedgie
and said, ‘Ha ha! You’ve got a girl’s last name.'”
-Conan O’Brien

“Washington, D.C. is the place where people read the most
in the country. In New York City, we do a lot of reading
too: parking tickets, health code violations, ransom notes,
and Chinese take-out menus.” -David Letterman

G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s

I was working in the sun all day, putting finishing touches on the new deck outside my house. My sister pulled into the driveway, greeted me, and looked over my work. “Wow,” she gushed, “you’re an expert.” Feeling complimented and satisfied, but…trying not to seem egotistical, I responded… “Once you get going, it’s pretty easy!” She looked puzzled and wondering if I’d misunderstood her I
asked, “What did you just say?” She replied, “I said, your neck’s burnt!”
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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? ‘Did he dazzle you with his extensive knowledge of mineral water? Or was it his in-depth analysis of, uh, uh, Marky Mark that finally reeled you in?’

Answer: Reality Bites! Spoken by Troy Dyer, played by Ethan Hawke, who also contributed a song to the soundtrack.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘It’s like in a Hitchcock movie, you know, where they tie you up in a rubber bag and throw you in the trunk. You find people.’
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Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2008, try and identify which song or which artist.” “Well you done done me and you bet I felt it I tried to be chill but you’re so hot that I melted I fell right through the cracks And now I’m trying to get back Before the cool done run out I’ll be giving it my best est Nothing’s going to stop me but divine intervention I reckon it’s again my turn to win some or learn some”

Answer: “I’m Yours” – Jason Mraz! “I’m Yours” is from Jason Mraz’s third studio album. The song was first released in the United States on February 12, 2008. The song won two nominations (Grammy Award for Song of the Year, and Best Male Pop Vocal Performance) at the 51st Grammy Awards.

Wednesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2008 try and identify which song or which artist. “So many people gonna say that they want you, To try to get you thinking they really care, But there’s nothing like the warmth of the one who has put in the time and you know he’s gonna be there, Back your border when she knows someone crossed it, Don’t let nobody put you down, who you’re with Take the pain of protecting your name, from the crutch to the cane to the high wire”

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Tuesday’s Quizzler is..

A different fruit (a total of twelve) is buried in every one of the following lines.

Example: A word is considered ‘buried’ when it can be read like P A R I S in the sentence “Grand-pa(pa ris)es at seven every morning.”
Can you detect them?

Ah! If I get my good ship home, I’ll find a tempting spot, Where mayhap pleasant flowers will bloom,
And there I’ll shape a charming cot.

Where bees sip nectar in each flower, And Philomel on hawthorn rests, I’ll shape a rustic, sun-kissed bower -A bower meet for angel guests.

Then she who lives and loves with me, Sing our days of calm repose,
Sole monarch of the flowers will be -For Myra is indeed a rose.

ANSWER: Ah! I(f I g)et my good ship home, I’ll fin(d a te)mpting spot, Where mayh(ap ple)asant flowers will bloom, And there I’ll sha(pe a ch)arming cot.

Where bees sip (nectar in e)ach flower, And Philo(mel on) hawthorn rests, I’ll sha(pe a r)ustic, sun-kissed bower -A bower meet f(or ange)l guests.

Then she wh(o live)s and loves with me, Sin(g our d)ays of calm repose, So(le mon)arch of the flowers will be -For My(ra is in)deed a rose. 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…
The following clues lead to two words or phrases that are the phonetic reverse of each other. When you answer the first clue and flip the syllables, you get the second answer. (Phonetic only, not letters.)Using the clues below, please find the words/phrases in question.

Example: Impertinent * Teetertotter
Answer: Saucy/Seesaw

1. Fundamental * Where the doctor works on a naval ship
2. Government assistance for the poor * Goodbye
3. Worst possible Test Score * Optimistic
4. Relevant * What Jesus was born in
5. Sofa * Cups, saucers, sugar bowl, etc. (2 words)
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5, MS. ANDREA L. BANKS AND MS. KIM HILLYARD. BRILLIANT SOLVING LADIES!_________________________________________________________________________________ 

Answers in THURSDAY Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/