WELCOME to Tuesday, February 8, 2010…..

A Canadian customer was calling to find out if there was a
faster way to trigger menu commands than mousing up to the
menus.

Agent: Certainly, sir. There are keyboard shortcuts for many
of those commands. For example, suppose you want to trigger
the Select All command…

Caller: Yes, I use that one all the time! How do I do it?

Agent: Well, you just press Control-A.

Caller (after a pause): Well, that’s not working for me.

Agent: Do you have a text document open in front of you?

Caller: Yes, I sure do.

Agent: OK, now press Control-A.

Caller: I am, but nothing happens.

Agent: The text isn’t highlighted?

Caller: No, there’s no change at all.

Agent: That’s odd. If you press Control-A the whole document
should be highlighted. Try it again. Press Control-A. Tell
me exactly what’s happening.

Caller (nearing his Canadian breaking point): Listen. I’m
pressing Control, eh? And nothing’s happening, eh?

Hey I’m just saying eh!  Have a great Tuesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“White Castle announced that they’re taking reservations for
Valentine’s Day. They say it’s the perfect place to take that
special lady you never want to see again.” -Conan O’Brien

“A new study found that the Reebok Classic is the most
popular shoe worn by burglars. The second most popular shoe
worn by burglars: yours.” -Jimmy Fallon

“According to doctors, marijuana use among the elderly is at
an all-time high. Apparently, senior citizens are moving very
slowly, making crazy statements, and going out to dinner very
early.” -Craig Ferguson

G u a r a n t e e d t o m a k e y o u l a u g h

A Jewish anthropologist, Benny Steinfeld, was working in the desert near Israel when he happened upon an odd looking vase. After cleaning it he pried open the lid and was astonished when a genie sprang from the container and granted him 3 wishes. Steinfeld wished for enormous wealth, huge land holdings and a bevy of beautiful wives. All wishes were granted, but on one condition. Never again in his life could the anthropologist get a haircut or shave. To do so would mean instant imprisonment in the same urn in which the genie had been imprisoned. All went well during the first few years of his lavish lifestyle, but his beard and long hair became more and more of a problem. One day, during a moment of weakness and desperation he ran to the bathroom, grabbed some scissors and began cutting off his beard. Immediately his fortunes vanished, and he found himself trapped in the urn lying in the desert sand. The moral of this story? “A Benny shaved is a Benny urned.”
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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?‘One day I heard the sound of a woman singing. She must not have understood that someone might hear her. I thought of mermaids…’  

Answer: ‘Zero Effect’
Bill Pullman is great as Darryl Zero, a reclusive, pill popping private dick, who seems to be only functional as the best and most unseen detective. Ben Stiller is good as his overprotective assistant.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from????‘My father was an evil abusive man…he killed my mother. She was sleeping, and then he slit his wrists. I was thirteen. I don’t talk about that much.’
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Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2000 -2002, try and identify which song or which artist.“I never win first place, don’t support the team, can’t take directions, and my socks are never clean. Teachers dated me, my parents hated me. I was always in a fight ’cause I can’t do nothing right.”

Answer: Pink
From “Don’t Let Me Get Me”. This song was the second hit from her CD “Missundaztood”, and stayed at number 1 for a month and a half.

Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2000-2002 try and identify which song or which artist.“Just a day, just an ordinary day, just trying to get by. Just a boy, just an ordinary boy, but he was looking to the sky.”

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Monday’s Quizzler is..

What is represented by this rebus?

Fun: E Fun: E

1)This
2)Is
3)A
4)Rebus

ANSWER:Too funny for words
There are two “Fun: E”s followed by four words.

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…  

Your task here is to change one letter in each of the following words, in order to find three (3) words with a common theme.

STEER
CRASS
PESTER 

TODAY’S QUIZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5! FOUR DAYS IN A ROW! WAY2GO JAZZZZZZZZZZ!

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Answers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/