WELCOME to Monday, March 28, 2011. Marriage……..

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence–a life sentence.

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.

Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor’s Degree and the woman gets her Masters.

Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman’s finger and two under the man’s eyes.

Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.

Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.

Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of “rings”:
* The Engagement Ring
* The Wedding Ring
* The Suffe-Ring
* The Endu-Ring

Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman! 
 

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y 

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. 

Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep. Carl Sandburg 

Life is just a phase you’re going through…you’ll get over it. 

There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. Oscar Wilde 

Everything has been figured out, except how to live. Jean-Paul Sartre 

An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived. Herbert Samuel 

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you’re still a rat. Lilly Tomlin 

For most men life is a search for the proper manilla envelope in which to get themselves filed. Clifton Fadiman 

Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Brendan Gill 

Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults in the first. Benjamin Franklin 

No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you.  Sholom Aleichem 

The basic rule of human nature is that powerful people speak slowly and subservient people quickly — because if they don’t speak fast nobody will listen to them. Michael Caine 

Life is like a game of poker: If you don’t put any in the pot, there won’t be any to take out. Moms Mabley 

It’s possible, you can never know, that the universe exists only for me. If so, it’s sure going well for me, I must admit. Bill Gates
G u a r a n t e e d t o R o l l Y o u r E y e s

The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there, I’m going to have to call the manager. The cowboy just groaned. The usher marched briskly back up the aisle. In a moment he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, “All right buddy, what’s you’re name?” “Sam,” the cowboy moaned. “Where ya from, Sam?”
With pain in his voice Sam replied…. “The balcony.”
_______________________________________________________

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from???“I have a brain for business and a body for sin.” 

Working Girl

Melanie Griffith, great movie!

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??Man: “I cain’t read!” Woman: “Now stop saying that, you’re gonna make me mad! I was a teacher and I taught some of the stupidest kids God put on this earth. Now, what letter sounds like rrrr?” Man: “Uh, arra?”

_____________________________________________________________

Thursday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2000 -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “Meet me halfway, right at the borderline. 

borderline

‘Meet Me Halfway’ went to number one in the UK in November 2009. It was also the band’s third consecutive top ten hit from their album ‘The E.N.D’. 

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2000 -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “Nothing’s going to stop me but divine intervention”

_______________________________________________________________________

Thursday’s Quizzler is..

My father gave me a brain teaser with two groups of words missing. The four words in each group are anagrams of each other. I’ve solved the first group, but I’m stuck on the second group. Can you help?

Time to decorate the Christmas tree! Putting up the lights was my job, but after that it was time to ENLIST some help. While the kids were busy adding TINSEL, I put on some music to LISTEN to; my favourite song is “SILENT Night”.

After we finished decorating the Christmas tree, I hung the stockings on the __1__. Feeling a chill, I looked down and had to __2__ my __3__ lapse; the fire was out. I threw on my __4__ and stepped out into the cold night to gather some firewood. Upon my return, we were soon roasting chestnuts and sipping eggnog to complete a wonderful evening.

Answer: 1. mantel, 2. lament, 3. mental, 4. mantle

Monday’s Quizzler is…

The following word pairs are anagrams which can be combined to form the name of an animal or insect.Try to figure it out.

1. Zeal, Gel

2. Neat, Help

3. Boa, Luff

4. Bow, Mat

5. Evil, Owner 
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! SUPER SOLVING JOB BANKS!

_________________________________________________________________________________ 

Answers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/